Stay
by Trixy2
Summary: The Day that started bad, and ended worse... DL as usual... Rated for Language and Violence Chapter 28 Rated M- be warned.
1. Chapter 1

Lindsay was attempting to leave Danny's apartment in a hurry, she had been late three times this week and was not making it a forth. It wasn't uncommon for her to stay here, she had enough of her stuff here to last a lifetime. Danny had been working a double and was not off for another ten hours, she was actually excited to go to work and see him. When he wasn't around her for longer then a couple hours she counted the minutes until she'd see him again.

Grabbing her keys from the bowl by Danny's front door she knocked a picture frame over, trying desperately to grab it before it fell to the floor, she tripped and fell just as hard landing in some fresh broken glass.

'Damnit!' She exclaimed at the fresh cut on the palm of her hand. Gasping through clenched teeth she got up and walked to Danny's kitchen grabbing a towel along the way. With her free hand she pulled her cell out of her coat pocket and dialed a familiar number.

'Messer?' He answers with enthusiasm in his tone.

'I'm going to be late for the fourth goddamn day in a row.' She snapped.

'Good morning Lindsay.' He replied, Lindsay could hear the smile in his voice.

'Good? No. I have to go to the hospital and get stitches so I'm going to be really late. Can you tell Mac?' She said running her hand under the sink, hissing at the pain in the process.

'Whoa, whoa... stitches? What happened?'

'Just my usual clumsy self, I knocked over a picture frame, fell and landed on some glass. I'm fine, it's just ruining my morning.' She paused then blurted out in anger, 'I can't do this anymore!'

'Do what, Linds?' Danny was concerned. _Do what anymore?_

'Sorry, I'm just bitchy.' She said trying to take his mind off of her last sentence.

'No, what's up?'

'This, I can't stay here all the time. My routine is shot! I can't make it to work on time, my stuff isn't here. I'm just so... augh... frustrated.' She sat down on his couch and nursed her hand in Danny's towel. 'I'm sorry. My hand just hurts.' She let out an audible sigh.

'You could just move in?' He said without thinking.

'Are we having this conversation again? I told you, I'm not ready.' She was grumpy and sounded meaner then she intended.

'Alright, alright.' He said with a chuckle at her grumpy mood. 'But you know, you don't have to stay everyday, you do have you're own apartment, it even has all of your own stuff in it.' Hearing Lindsay letting out an audible sigh from this sarcasm, he rolled his eyes and continued, 'Listen, I'm going to talk to Mac and tell him that you've come down with something. Take the day. Relax, I'll be home tonight we can talk, OR we can go to your place. Just take a breather? Alright?' Danny did his best to calm Lindsay, she sounded on the verge of tears.

'No, I can't, I have too much work to do.' A tear escaped her eyes, she was exhausted.

'So what? I got this Montana. Just relax, you're work will still be here tomorrow. Now, get those stitches and go home and get some sleep, you sound exhausted.' His tone was mellow and comforting.

'Yeah, you're right. Thanks baby, call me later alright?' She said, bringing a smile to her face. Even in his absence he could still make her smile.

'I will, remember... relax. I love you.' He said as he got in to his truck, working a double he finally got a break and was heading home in desperate need of a shower and a change of clothes.

'Love you too, talk to you later.' She said, ending the phone call.

'Alright.' She said to herself as she stood up and picked up her bag and keys and went to the door with the towel still wrapped around her cut hand.

Reaching the handle to open the door, she heard someone on the other side, suddenly it flew open making her jump backwards. A large man in black leather jacket entered, Lindsay moved back as quick as she could all while reaching for her gun. The large man reached her first and grabbed her by the hair, taking the gun from her holster and pushing it into the small of her back.

'Ah, got me a little lady.' The man whispered in her ear.

'Let me go! Who are you?' She said reaching her hands up to his hand in his hair, trying to relieve the pressure.

'Whoa, calm down princess, I'm not here for you, but this is nice surprise.' With his free hand he reached around and ran his fingers between her legs. Her body shook with fear, she tried to pull away, but with no where to go, he pulled his hand up her stomach to her breasts and squeezed them uncomfortably. Feeling her hair rip in his fingers, her body trembled with fear.

'Don't fucking touch me, you pig!' she screeched, as she turned and attempted to scratch his face with her nails. Breaking his flesh he let go of her hair.

'Ah you bitch!' He said as he threw a punch to her stomach and once again into her chest. She doubled in pain and gasped for as the air left her lungs. Grabbing her by the hair again he pulled her up to face him. 'That wasn't very lady like you stupid bitch!' He screamed as he back handed her across the face hard enough to split her lip.

'Ah!' Lindsay yelled out as he punched her again, this time bringing her to his knees. 'Stop! Please, what do you want?' She yelled tasting blood on her tongue.

Leaning down over her he pulled her chin up to meet his face. "I'll ask the questions, is that clear?' Lindsay nodded in reply. 'Good.' He said as he pulled her head back again by the hair, as Lindsay let a whimper escape her lips. 'Now where is that Messer piece of shit?'

'I don't know.' She asked.

'Don't lie to me bitch!' He screamed pulling her close.

'I don't... know. He's working, he could be anywhere. Who are you?' Bringing his hand down across her face again.

'You don't listen do you? I said I'll ask the questions. I think I should teach you a lesson.' He said as he pulled her across the floor and threw her on the couch.

'Ah, No! Stop, help! Please, someone help me!' She screamed as he pulled her head close and pushed the gun into her temple.

'Keep quiet, ya hear?' He sounded evil. His eyes were dead, Lindsay let a single tear roll down her cheek as she once again nodded, breathing deeply as fear tortured her heart.

Letting go of her hair, Lindsay struggled silently as he reached down taking both of her arms and pinning them above her head. Pinning her to the couch with his heavy body, Lindsay struggled to breath and struggled out of his reach.

'Mmm... I love when they fight back.' He said in a sinister tone as he licked Lindsay's cheek.

'Please? Please don't do this!' Lindsay said as tears ran down her cheeks.

With one hand he ripped open her shirt, with the other he held the gun to her temple. 'You taste sweet. Messer is a lucky man, but not for long.' He said as he moved down Lindsay's body to her pants and ripped them open, Lindsay squeezed her eyes shut.

'Come on baby, don't you want to watch me fuck you?' He laughed. Tears stung her eyes. She was trapped. She couldn't move under his large frame, and the gun hurt as he pushed against her skull.

'Who are you?' Lindsay said as her voice began to crack. Lifting the gun he brought it down across her face as blood dripped into her mouth, it took her a moment to recover from the blow, she felt blood dripping down her face.

'I said no questions, you stupid cow.' He leaned close so Lindsay could feel his breath on her cheek, 'Am I clear?' Lindsay once again nodded in agreement as tears fell freely down her face.

'Good.' Moving to his own pants, he unzipped his fly. 'Girl, you're going to feel good.' He licked his lips as he pulled the zipper open. Without thinking Lindsay lifted her body and with all the strength in her, she kneed him as hard as she could. He screamed out in pain dropping the gun to Lindsay's side. Grabbing the gun she kicked him off of her small frame.

'GET UP! GET UP YOU PIECE OF SHIT!' Lindsay screamed as she stood over him gun in hand.

'Oh is that how it is?' He said, nursing the pain between his legs.

'Yeah that's how it is. Get your piece of shit off my floor.' Reaching to the side table she grabbed the phone and started dialing. 'This is Detective Monroe, I need backup at 87th street and...' The man lunged at her and knocked her down. Without dropping the gun she heard the gun fire. As he reached up her arms and fought to the gun.

Yelling out in pain as he punched and kneed her body, she fought for her life. Bringing the gun down she hit him across the top of the head, he shook off the pain and continued to struggle. 'You bitch!' He yelled as blood rushed down his face.

Pulling the gun to his chest pulled the trigger. She felt his body stiffen above her, she pulled again, this time he reached out pulling her hand away as the shots rang out. Pulling the gun back around she hit him across the face once again, seeing blood spread across his chest.

Rolling out from under him she kept the gun aimed at his head and pulled herself up. Holding her stomach where he had hit her, she watched as he gasped for breath.

'I'm gonna kill you, slut!' He said between heavy breaths unable to move.

'Yeah, I'd like to see that trick fucker!' Lindsay said with a small grin on her lips.

Suddenly Lindsay felt another presence in the room and turned quickly aiming the fun, before she fired she saw who was there and her heart dropped to the floor.

Danny stood with a look of shock across his face, his gun in his hand at his side, his face was pale.

'Lindsay? What...are you... what?' He said between gasps bringing his hand to his chest he pulled back and realized he was bleeding. Lindsay walked towards him turning her aim back to the man laying on the ground before them.

'Danny?' She said cautiously as he backed against the wall.

'What...' he said looking up at Lindsay, 'Linds?' Air leaving his lungs as he slid down the wall behind him blood following him to the ground.

'Danny!' She yelled as she ran towards him, pulling his chin towards her, ignoring the blistering pain in her own body. 'Danny! Oh god!' She said reaching into his pocket and pulling out his cell phone as his breathing became more labored. She called 9-1-1 as she held onto his hand. Looking behind her she saw that the man was now unconscious, hoping he was dead she turned back to Danny and waited for the ambulance and police.

'Are you... ah... ok? Who... was that?' Danny said between hard gasps.

'He was looking for you, I had to fought him off, he was going to kill me... I'm so sorry Danny. I'm sorry!' She said holding her hands on the gapping wound on his chest.

'What did... he do.. to you?' He said with tears in his eyes. Forgetting about her own injuries she brought a hand up to her cheek to find a gash across it with blood still flowing from it.

'I'm ok... I kicked his ass. I think he's dead. Help is on the way, Dan.' She smiled, once again checking behind her to make sure that son-of-a-bitch is down for the count.

'I'm sorry.' He said squeezing his eyes shut against the pain. 'I had to... change, I wasn't gonna come home... I just had to change. What about your hand? You need stitches... I should have come home sooner... I'm sorry.' He was babbling, he wasn't sure what he was talking about or why he was talking. His breathing suddenly became more labored, struggling he continued. 'I should have come home... sooner. I'm sorry, you need stitches.'

'Danny? Just concentrate on breathing, ok? Just stay with me.' Lindsay said opening cell and dialing a different number, all while holding her hand over the wound on Danny's chest.

'Taylor' He answer promptly.

'Mac! He's shot, I shot him... someone... someone was trying to kill me I shot him!' Lindsay was frantic.

'Lindsay? Calm down, shot who? What's going on?' Mac said trying to understand her.

'Danny! I shot Danny! I didn't mean to. There was a man here he was trying to rape me I fought him off and I fired my gun, I killed him and I hit Danny. He's loosing a lot of blood. Oh god!' Tears ran down her face as Danny's eyes began to close.

'No Danny! Danny stay with me, ambulance is on the way, please Danny, just hold on!' She slapping his cheek trying to wake him.

'Can't... Linds...' His mouth barely moved, his voice was weak.

'Lindsay?' She heard come from the phone that she dropped trying to keep Danny conscious.

'I'm here Mac, he's loosing a lot of blood. I think the man is dead, I shot him.'

'Ok, we're on the way, we'll be there soon. Just hold on, keep Danny awake.'

'Yeah, yeah... ok.' Lindsay said dropping the phone again and holding Danny's chest wound. Blood flowed freely over her fingers as she talked to Danny, making sure his eyes stayed open.

* * *

**Hello lovelynesses... I thought I'd make Lindsay my subject this time. I went for something different this time... but still the same basic... Danny AngstTrix stories...**

**Review and tell me if I should continue. **


	2. Chapter 2

The ambulance had come and taken Danny and the man away. Lindsay had already spoken with the officers who were first on scene, she now sat on the couch staring at the large pool of blood laying across the hardwood where Danny's body had once been. Feeling someone walk towards her, her body stiffened but did not move as she kept her gaze on the blood before her.

'Lindsay?' She heard a man voice say from behind her. 'Are you alright?' He continued as he placed a hand on her shoulder. Jumping from the sudden contact Lindsay found herself on her feet staring at her boss.

'Mac? You scared me.' She said looking at the floor in front of his feet.

'Sorry,' he said with his hands by his head as if trying to surrender; he continued, 'Lindsay I need you to tell me what happened.' He said walking closer to her.

'It... it happened really fast. I don't really...' A tear escaped her eye as Mac walked close to her and pulled her into a hug. She did not hug him back, she just let herself be hugged. Blinking back tears she pulled away from the older man.

'He wasn't here to kill me, he was looking for Danny. He attacked me, he went for my gun and tried to rape me. I fought back and shot him, the gun went off a couple more times. I didn't even know Danny was here, or even planning on being here. I can't believe this is happening.' She explained, tears lined the rim of her eye lids as she thought of the hole in Danny's chest. It was her fault, she blamed herself.

'Have you gotten looked at yet?' Mac said touching her arm just above her left elbow.

'Yeah, no... not really. I told them to look after Danny. The man is still alive, they took him to Mercy Hospital; maybe when he wakes up we can find out why he was after Danny. There was a reason he was here, he wanted Danny. He kept asking me about Danny.' Lindsay had yet to make eye contact with her superior. Fear covered her body, fear of killing the man she loved.

'It's not your fault Lindsay.' He said as she let out a deep breath. 'I'm going to get Flack in here to take your statement then Stella can ride with you to the hospital.'

'I'm fine!' Lindsay said finally looking him in the eyes. 'I just need to find out how he's doing.' She said pushing past him.

'Lindsay, it's not an option. You have to talk to Flack then we can take you to the hospital. We need to go over your injuries.' Mac said as he stopped her by grabbing her small arm in his hand as she passed.

'Let me go Mac!' She said as she struggled. Mac noticed right away that the colour was quickly leaving her face.

'Hey what's going on here?' Flack said walking into the middle of the altercation.

'I'm going to check on Danny, I shot him. I need to know if he's alright.' Lindsay said as she continued to pull against Mac's grip.

'Lindsay, you need to calm down. I.A.B. is going to want to talk to you, and I'd like to know the story before they get here. Talk to us?' He said letting go of her arm as Flack stepped closer.

'Come on Linds, talk to me.' Flack said from behind her.

'He was going to rape me, I kneed him in the crotch and took my gun back from him. I shot him in the chest, when I tried to shoot again he push the aim away from him and the gun went off. I don't know how many times. When I got away from him that's when I saw him, I didn't even know he was there. I didn't know.' Lindsay had tears running down her cheeks. The salt in her tears burned at the cut on her cheek bone where the gun had made contact.

'Do you mean Danny? You didn't know he was here?' Flack questioned.

'Yes, I was just talking to him, he was at the lab. Then suddenly he was here. I... I didn't know.' Lindsay wiped tears from her face, and noticed her cut was still bleeding.

'We know Linds, this isn't your fault.' Flack said placing a comforting hand on her shoulder.

'He worked a double, he told Stella he was going home to change. Just bad luck he was here to take the shot.' Mac said talking over Lindsay's soft sobs to Flack.

'Lindsay, Stella is going to go with you to the hospital and take some swabs and photos of your injuries. It's going to be alright. We'll take care of you.' Mac said as Lindsay felt her knees buckling beneath her.

'Mac... I don't feel so...' She said as her body gave away beneath her. Flack moved to catch her but missed as she fell to the ground with a thump.

'Lindsay? Lindsay wake up!' Flack said as he checked her neck for a pulse, it was weak but it was there.

'Jesus Mac what did this guy do to her?' He said as he lifted her shirt over her stomach noticing the bruises forming on her pale skin.

'Oh god We don't have time to wait for an ambulance, grab her. Let's move!' Mac said with fear in his tone. Flack lifted her small frame up into his arms and carried her from the apartment to the S.U.V. waiting out front of the building, as Mac followed close behind. Loading Lindsay into the back seat with Flack, Mac jumped into the drivers seat and began speeding their way through downtown trying to save yet another member of his team for the second time today.


	3. Chapter 3

The area that Don Flack had chose to wait in was a small lounge that nurses used for coffee refills and to rest their feet; the lights were dim and the blinds were nearly shut creating a mellow mood for him to collect his thoughts. Sitting on a small plastic chair with his hands folded in his lap he had never felt so helpless, two close friends were fighting for their lives and there was nothing he could do but wait in a stark white room while the team looked at evidence. Secretly hoping the man responsible for the damages done would die, he knew that wasn't where his head should be. Taking a deep breath he closed his eyes, pushing his anger aside and attempting to push thoughts of hate from his mind. The door clicked open and Flack opened his eyes and stood up. A young Doctor came into the room and held out her hand to shake his.

'Det. Flack? I'm Dr. Weber, I worked on Det. Monroe.' She said with confidence.

'How's she doin'?' He asked hoping for a positive response.

'She's stable, we're moving her up to surgery. Looks like whoever did this beat her hard enough to bust her spleen. She's a fighter this one.' Dr. Weber had a look a disgust on her face as she explained the young detectives condition.

'Son of a bitch.' Flack said with a sigh before continuing. ' What about head injuries? Looks like he used her head as a punching bag.' He said as he pulled a notepad from his jacket pocket and began to write down her information.

'C.T. showed no sign of head trauma, looks just a concussion. I had to stitch up her cheek and she has a minor cut on her lip, but other then that its mostly just cuts and bruises. It's the internal injuries I'm worried about.' Flack instantly liked this woman, he trusted her.

'Thanks, Doc.' Flack said finishing his notes. 'One more thing, did you work on the cop that was hit? He was brought in not too long before we brought in Lindsay, sorry, Det. Monroe.' He asked with a kink in his brow.

'The chest wound?' She asked as Flack nodded in reply. 'I didn't look at him no, I do however know that he is still in surgery. I can get an update for you if you'd like?'

'Yeah, that would be great. Once again, thanks.' Flack said through a forced smile. Dr. Weber noticed the change in his appearance and placed a hand on his shoulder.

'We'll take care of them. I know how cops can be, you're all very close. If you need anything... you know where I'll be.' Her smile was warm, being a doctor she had the natural instincts in comfort. Flack felt better knowing she would be there for his friends.

'Thank you.' He replied with a nod. 'Oh, the other Detective's name is Daniel Messer.'

'Thank you, I'll look into and come and find you.' She said leaving the room and Flack with his thoughts once again. When the room was empty Flack stood with his hands still folded over his note book in the middle of the room staring at the door where Dr. Weber once stood.

'Come on guys, don't give up on me now.' He said out loud hoping his prayers would be answered. 'Don't give up.' He repeated closing his eyes and pulling his phone out of his pocket to update the team on their conditions.

* * *

Walking through the emergency room doors, Stella felt a chill run up her spine; the grim faces of the uniformed officers told her that today was only going to get worse. Walking to the front desk she waved down a older nurse with curly black hair. 

'Excuse me? Excuse me, Hi! I'm looking for a Det. Flack?' She asked with a hurried tone.

'Det. Flack, I believe he went upstairs. Are you a cop?' The woman asked, knowing the answer. Without answering Stella pulled her badge off of her belt and pushed it in the woman face, her patience was wearing thin.

'He's on the third floor; waiting area for surgery.' She answered with attitude, as Stella sprinted down the hall to the elevators.

Reaching the third floor she found Flack leaning against a wall staring at nothing. It wasn't until she placed a hand between his shoulder blades that he turned to see her.

'Stel, I didn't see you come in.' He said ringing his hands over his eyes.

'That much was obvious. How are they?' Keeping her hand in place on his back she could see he was conflicted.

'Lindsay has a busted spleen, some bad internal bleeding. They've been working on her for the past two hours.' Stella looked to the ground afraid to ask the next question.

'And Danny?' She said looking back up at Flack whose eyes would not meet hers. Letting out a sigh he answered.

'It's bad Stella, it's bad.' He stated finally looking her in the eyes. 'He has a nicked artery close to the heart, and his lung collapsed from impact. He's been in surgery about three hours and they expect another eight to nine. I don't know.' He said in a low voice.

'He'll pull through, it's Danny.' She said moving her hand in a circular motion to comfort him.

'This is bigger then him Stella. Much bigger.' Fear was present in his voice and face.

'I know.' Stella didn't know if she believed it herself, or if she was trying to convince herself, she just knew it was her job to keep everyone together, and she would.

'Anything at the apartment?' Flack said turning to face Stella.

'Oh, um yeah. Everything from Lindsay's account matches up. Looks like the man kicked the door in and attacked her. Danny was hit by friendly fire while Lindsay was fighting him off. What we don't know is who this guy is, and why he was after Danny?' Stella finished. 'Any news on him?'

'Yeah, he's being bagged and tagged right now. He died about forty minutes ago. Looks like one of Lindsay's shots hit the intended target. Through and through to the heart. He didn't have a chance.' Flack answered as he sat down in a chair in the waiting room, Stella followed suit and seated herself next to him.

'Hawkes is looking into him. See if we can I.D. him and get some background on him. I wanna know if he was working alone or if there is someone else out there looking to put Danny in the ground.' Stella said.

Flack looked at her, gave her a nod and took Stella's hand in his. As they both sat staring ahead, waiting for their friends to pull through, they both shared the same thought.

_'They have to make it through this, they have to.' _


	4. Chapter 4

The waiting room was quiet and cold. Flack and Stella had been sitting so long without sound of movement it could have been mistaken for a morgue. Stella had fallen asleep on Flack's shoulder a short time ago as Flack sat staring ahead waiting for the doors to the operating room to open. Stella readjusted herself in her sleep as Flack moved her head to lay her down.

'Stella? Stel, wake up.' Flack said in a low voice.

'What? Any word?' She said sitting up.

'No, no, I'm going to get some coffee, want one?' He said leaning over her.

'Yeah, yeah I think I need one. How long was I out?' He said rubbing her eyes with her knuckles.

'Not long, let me know when the doc comes out, I'm gonna call Mac and see if there is any news on this jag-off. I'll be back.' He said turning and leaving the hallway.

Stella sat for a second willing herself to stay awake. Pulling herself back into a sitting position, she reached her arms out and stretched. Standing and walking to the window in the waiting area she noticed that the once beautiful morning had become black clouds with thunder and lightning. Watching the clouds roll and crash, she did not notice the doors open and a Doctor in surgical gowns approach her.

'Are you here for Ms. Monroe?' He said plainly.

'What? Sorry... yes I am here for Lindsay.' She answered in a startled tone.

'Are you family?' The doctor said pointing her in the direction of the chairs.

'I'm her supervisor, her family is in Montana. Oh, Stella Bonesera.' She said extended her hand to the doctor as they sat down.

'Hi Stella, I'm Dr. Murphy. Lindsay's doing great. We've removed her spleen and stopped the bleeding, but, unfortunately there was nothing we could do.'

'What? I thought you said she was doing great?' Stella was confused, and it showed.

'We couldn't save the baby. There was too much trauma to her abdomen, the blood loss cause hypotension. The uterus is very sensitive to this kind of trauma. The O.B.G.Y.N. is finishing up the D&C now, she'll be in recovery and once she is well enough to move we'll she'll be placed into a private room. Once again, I'm sorry.' Mr. Murphy said with a frown.

'I didn't even know she was pregnant.' Shock moved through her body, _Did Lindsay even know she was pregnant_? 'How far along was she?' Stella wondered out loud.

'About five weeks.' His voice was soothing.

'Oh god.' Stella put a hand over her mouth. She had known Lindsay was busy lately, but was it possible for her to be so busy she did not know she was pregnant and if she did, had she told Danny. 'Th.. thank you Doctor.' She said with shaking hands.

'I'm sorry. When she is out of recovery I'll let you know. Is there anyone I can call? The father maybe?' The doctor put a comforting hand on her lap.

'No, he's actually in surgery right now.' A tear fell from her eye.

'The chest wound?' Stella gave a nod to answer. 'I see, he seems to be doing better, they were having some trouble closing his artery and his pressure is still low. They are doing everything they can, but I want you to prepare yourself. With these types of injuries to the heart, they involve opening the chest cavity, when this happens his chances of recovery drop drastically.' Letting out a deep breath, he continued, 'Like I said though, we're doing everything we can. I'm sorry.' He said while giving Stella's knee a light squeeze, with that he stood and left the room. Leaving Stella in shock as tears rolled down her cheeks.

* * *

Hawkes had been staring a computer screen so long his eyes felt like they were pulling from his skull. Only when it was absolutely crucial was when D.N.A. results taken this long. Letting out an esaperated sigh, he stretched his arms over his head and cracked his back. Feeling a presence in the room he turned to see Mac standing behind him. 

'Mac, any news?' He asked looking at the worried look on his face.

'Lindsay is out of surgery, she's doing alright. Danny is... he's still in surgery. Doctors think it'll be awhile.' He said plainly as his words got caught on Danny.

'He'll make it, Mac, it's Danny.' He convinced himself.

'Yeah.' Mac said, unconvinced. 'Where are we with D.N.A.?' He said pulling their attention off their pained friends and back to the task at hand.

'Nothing yet, it's been running for hours. Either this guy isn't in the system or is in a different database.' As he finished his sentence, the computer beeped with results. 'Oh my god.' Hawkes said staring at the screen in disbelief.

'What? Hawkes who is it?' Mac said looking closer, realizing the shock. 'You've got to be kidding me.' Mac said as Hawkes looked up at his boss with the same look of dread on his face while Mac read the name out loud. 'Anthony Joesph Messer, Danny's cousin.'

'Have we contacted his parents?' Hawkes asked pulling his cell phone from his pocket.

'Personnelle has been trying to reach them all day, no answer.' Mac said as Hawkes started dialing.

'Hello, this is Sheldon Hawkes from the crime lab, I need all personal contact information on Danny Messer brought to the lab A.S.A.P... no, I don't have ten minutes I need it now.' Hawkes yelled into his phone while Mac looked through the file on screen looking for any leads. 'Thank you.' He finished hanging up the phone. "Personnelle will have the file up here in a couple minutes. Why would his cousin want him dead?'

'I don't know Hawkes, but I sure as hell am not going to wait around here looking for answers. We need to find his parents.' Mac said leaving the lab Hawkes hot on his heals.


	5. Chapter 5

Flack had returned to the lab to follow up on some new leads regarding their friends; Lindsay had finally been moved from the Recovery Room to a hospital room, where Stella sat holding her hand. The colour was missing from her face, apart from the bruising and cuts that covered her pale skin. Stella had been with her for over an hour watching her chest rise and fall with the soothing sound of her heart monitor beeping. Unaware if Lindsay knew she was pregnant, she feared the conversations that followed her rise to consciousness. Praying she'd sleep until Danny was out of surgery she sat with her rubbing her thumb against the back of her hand. Learning of Danny's condition and the condition of her once baby will be too much for her to handle, it was in her best interest to hold back until she was stronger.

It had been a couple hours since her surgery, with a head trauma, there was no way to know when she would awaken. Sitting alone in the dully lite hospital room, Stella felt weak. There was nothing she could do to find the perpitrator that did this to good people, as a police officer she felt useless, as a friend she knew where she was meant to be. With one hand in a light hold of Lindsay's hand with the other she massaged her temple. Letting out sigh she felt something moving, looking up she saw Lindsay's brown eyes fluttering open. Leaning forward in her chair, she squeezed Lindsay's hand, Lindsay's hand reacted by squeezing back.

'Lindsay?' She said cautiously moving towards the bed. 'It's Stella, Lindsay. I'm here.'

Lindsay squeezed her hand again, she began to feel the rest of her body waking, she moved her lips to speak, but her throat was dry.

'Stel...' She breathed out against her dry lips and mouth.

'I'm here Lindsay. Open your eyes.' She squeezed her hand realizing her eyes had yet to open completely. It felt as if a bag was brought down over her head, blocking the light.

'What... happened?' She licked her lips pushing her lids above her eyes, as they opened Stella came into view. 'Where... am I?' She asked softly finding her voice. She suddenly had a gut feeling something was wrong.

'You don't remember? You were attacked Lindsay.' Stella said calmly, not knowing how much information she should give in her weakened state.

'Where is Danny?' Lindsay said as her eyes opened and began scanning the room. 'Stella, where is he?' The look on Stella's face told her that she wasn't going to like the answer. 'Stella?'

'He's not here, Lindsay.' She soothed the young woman whose hands began to shake. 'He's in surgery.'

'No, no... he has to be here. Danny?' Lindsay tempted to yell, but it only came out as scratch. 'Stella, where is Danny?' She said with tears threatening to fall.

'He's been shot Lindsay. They are doing everything they can, he's going to be alright.' Stella couldn't bring herself to explaining how he was injured.

Stella moved to the space beside her on the bed and took her hand into her lap and wiped the hair from her eyes.

'They are taking good care of him Lindsay. He's going to be ok.' Stella watched as realization came to Lindsay's face.

'Oh god, it was me. I shot him. Oh god.' She said tempting to sit up, being unable to do so, Stella held her shoulders to the bed, afraid of the damaged that could be brought by her sudden movements.

'Don't do this Lindsay, you're not strong enough. This isn't your fault, someone was trying to kill you. This isn't your fault. He's going to be alright, when he is out of surgery the doctors are going to find us and let us know. He is going to fine.' She said wiping the tears from under Lindsay's eyes with her thumb. Though she had no children, Stella couldn't help but to be motherly.

'How long?' She said calmly.

'What do you mean?' Stella said, confused of the question.

'How long has he been in surgery? What's wrong with him?' Feeling her eyelids dropping once again, she needed answers.

'Just under eight hours. It's a difficult injury.' She could no longer look Lindsay in the eye, for fear of loosing her control.

'This can't be happening, it can't be. What am I supposed to do if he dies?' Lindsay asked, knowing there was no right answer, knowing that even if he dies, she still won't know.

Stella looked at her friend, knowing anything she says at that moment won't make a difference. Instead she gave her a comforting look and squeezed her small hand in hers. Opening her mouth to speak, she was interrupted by the sound of someone entering the room. Turning around she found an older Doctor, one she had yet to meet.

'Det. Bonesera? May I speak with you for a moment?' The man asked with a saddened look on his face.

'Yeah, yes... no problem.' Stella said getting off of the bed, turning to Lindsay before she left the room she gave her a smile and promised her return.

Moving out into the hallway, the Doctor, whom was dressed in scrubs, closed the door behind her.

'Detective, I'm Dr. Benson. I am Danny's cardiac surgeon.' He stated folding his arms across his chest.

'How is he?' Stella blurted out quickly.

'He... he's stable. We've repaired the hole in his heart, he is still considered critical, but he made it through surgery.' The older man looked over his glasses at Stella.

'Hole? I thought it was a nicked artery?' Confusion hit her for the second time today.

'Yes, at first glance we thought it was only a small tear, however when we took him off bypass we noticed another hole on his heart, he began bleeding out. It was touch and go, we nearly lost him a couple times.' Taking a large breath he continued, 'I'm not here to tell you he's in the clear however. We are watching him very closely, when the heart has been through this kind of trauma, there is a possibility of blood clots. His heart is weak right now, he's lucky to have made it to the hospital let alone surgery. This kid has someone looking out for him.' He finished as Stella's mouth went dry thinking of a way to explain this to Lindsay.

'Thank you, Doctor. Thank you.' She said looking at the ground and letting out a silent prayer.

'The nurses have informed me that they cannot get through to any family member for him. Is there anyone else I can speak with.' The doctor asked.

'What do you mean? You can't find his parents?'

'No, we've tried all contact numbers you've given us.' He answered plainly. Without an answer Stella gave the doctor the same questioning glance they shared. 'Would you like me to inform Ms. Monroe of her boyfriends condition? It might be easier coming from me?' She didn't know why but she liked this man, he had a confidence Stella liked.

'Um, yeah. That might be a good idea. Thanks.' She said as Dr. Benson led the way into the room.

* * *

The front door to the Messer home was a large oak door, when Flack knocked it created a loud bellowing sound throughout the front steps of the old Staten Island home. On the third try, Flack decided to turn the handle, surprisingly the door was open. Turning his attention back to Hawkes and Mac, they pulled their guns from the holsters and entered the old home. 

'Mr. and Mrs. Messer? N.Y.P.D.' Flack announced entering the front door. When no one answered the three men separated to clear the house.

'Mr. Messer? It's Don Flack, anyone home?' He called out entering the living room, seeing that it had been destroyed.

'Flack, kitchen.' He heard Mac say, as he followed the man's voice to the kitchen.

Upon entering the kitchen, Flack came into view with a pool of blood in the middle of the room, which had also been turned upside down.

'I'm thinking they were abducted.' Hawkes said leaning down over the blood pool. 'This doesn't look like enough blood to kill someone, but did enough damage.'

'How is Danny's cousin connected to this other then the fact that he is Danny's cousin? I mean, it can't be ransome, they aren't exactly well off.' Flack said looking around the modest home.

'You don't attempt a murder rape, if you don't have a good reason. Someone wants Danny to suffer, but why?' The three men stood looking at each other hoping for answers as Flack pulled his radio out and called in the possible abduction.

* * *

The Intensive Care Unit had a feeling of sadness, everything from the sounds to the smells always reminded her of how close to death people became while staying here. Walking through the beds of people attached to ventilators and machines to keep them alive, Stella stopped at the end of the bed which held her friend. With many tubes entering different parts of his body, it took the humanity out of him, machines keeping him alive, pumping him with fluids. Looking to his I.V.'s she noticed they were still giving him blood, it had been eleven hours since he had been shot and he still could not catch up on the blood loss. 

Fear clouded her mind as she moved to his side, afraid to touch his weak frame, she rested her palms on the side rail of the hospital bed. Tears rested on the edge of her eyes as she watched his chest rise and fall as the ventilator fed him oxygen.

'Hey Danny, it's me, Stella. I didn't think you should be alone so I came to check up on you.' She took a breathe wondering if he could hear her. 'I wanted to let you know that Lindsay is doing great, she's a fighter. The perp is dead, Lindsay shot him in the heart, good aim I suppose.' She smiled at the irony of the situation. Squeezing her eyes shut she let the tears fall down her cheek. 'You have to fight Danny, Lindsay needs you, the team needs you. I don't think she'll be able to live with herself if you don't wake up. I know you can get through this; it'll take a hell of a lot more then a bullet to take down Danny Messer, you're a super cop.' Stella smiled and came up with the courage to touch his hand. Intertwining her hand in his she squeezed her fingers around his fingers, staying away from the I.V. that entered the top of his hand. 'Come on Danny.' She repeated leaning down and kissing his forehead. 'You can do this.' She finished leaning her forehead against his, once again letting her mothering skills take over.


	6. Chapter 6

It had been forty-three hours since Danny and Lindsay were brutally attacked, the leads were drying up, the team was exhausted and there was still no change in Danny's condition. With tired eyes, the team checked and double checked the evidence found at the Messer family home. There were only one set of prints that were out of place, but were not located in any database. The blood stain in the kitchen was a match to Danny's father, the amount of blood was worrisome.With no other leads, the team was forced to look into other members of Danny's family.

Mac sat at him desk reading over the case files when he heard a knock, looking up he noticed Stella standing in the door way. The black circles under her eyes proved she had spent the night sleeping badly in a hospital chair.

'How you holdin' up?' Mac asked as Stella walked into the office and sat in the chair in front of Mac's desk.

'Better then Lindsay.' She said with a sigh, as she sunk into the chair. 'Her mother and sister got here a couple hours ago from Montana. Apparently the storms delayed all flights coming into New York. She's asleep most of the time.'

'Good, that's good.' Mac said, shuffling some papers.

'Mac, I need to tell you something. I can't carry it around anymore.' Stella said leaning forward rubbing her temples. Mac stopped what he was doing and looked up at her.

'What? What's wrong?' Concern present in his voice.

'It's about Lindsay.' She said rubbing her eyes and taking a breath. 'She was pregnant, and lost the baby.'

'What?' Mac said in disbelief, 'Does she know?' Mac sat back and folded his arms over his chest.

'No, she doesn't. She hasn't asked about it either, I don't think she even knew she was pregnant. The doctors think it is in her best interest wait until she is stronger to let her know. She doesn't need the stress, besides she has been sleeping since surgery. I just... I can't keep it to myself, I feel like I'm going crazy.' She finished as her voice cracked.

'It's alright.' Mac said softly.

'No, no Mac. I don't think it is. Nothing about this is alright.' Stella said wiping the tears from under her eyes.

'I know, you're right.' Pausing his thoughts went to Danny. 'Any news on Danny?' Stella looked up quickly.

'No change. It's the looks the doctors keep exchanging that worries me, it's as if they are hiding something.' Stella said.

'You think it's worse then they're leading on?' Stella nodded. 'As long as he keeps fighting, there is still a good chance.' Taking a second, they both sat with their thoughts.

'You must be tired, why don't you get some sleep? With no leads there isn't much you can do.If anything comes up, I'll let you know.' He said getting up from his desk and walking towards where Stella sat placing a comforting hand on her shoulder. 'I promise.'

Stella considered her options, looking up at Mac she answered. 'Maybe I'll just lay down in the break room. Come get me if there is any change.'

'I will.' Mac said as Stella stood and left the room. With a deep sigh, Mac returned to his desk to look over his notes.

* * *

Her eyes opened slightly, taking in the low light in the room. Scanning the area around her bed she noticed Stella was no longer present, but was replaced with her Mother and Sister. 

'Mom?' She said in a groggy tone.

'Hey baby, I'm here.' Mrs. Monroe said moving to Lindsay's side and taking her hand.

'I screwed up, Mom.' The gravity of the situation came back to her.

'No, no you didn't. Danny is going to be fine, I've been praying for him. God will listen, baby.' She cooed, hoping to enlighten her daughter. Lindsay was not a believer.

'If there was a God, he wouldn't have done this! Praying isn't going to help!' Lindsay spat out in anger and frustration.

'Linds, don't say that. You have to believe that God will make him better and he will help.' She squeezed her hand tighter. 'Pray with me Lindsay.' Lindsay instinctively pulled her hand away.

'No, Mom. I've seen enough bad shit on my job to know that he won't make this better. No one can. I don't need God right now, I need my mother.' Tears appeared in her mothers eyes. 'I need to see my Doctor can you find him?'

Her mother got to her feet and left the room in hunt for Dr. Murphy. Lindsay's sister replaced her mother at Lindsay's side.

'Harsh Linds.' Her sister said plainly.

'Come on Lisa, you know she always dumps that stuff me when I don't need it.' Lindsay said pulling herself into a sitting position, hissing in pain as she went.

'I know... how are you feeling?' Lisa asked.

'I want to see Danny. I need to see what I did to him.' Lindsay answered as tears came to her eyes.

'I don't think thats a good idea.' Lisa said rubbing her hand on her sisters forearm.

'Why? I need to see him Lisa!' Lindsay said as her voice cracks. 'I need to tell him I'm sorry.'

'You will, when you are well enough to move. The doctors think it's best if you stay calm and in bed, they don't want you to disrupt your injuries.'

'Screw my injuries. I don't get why everyone is walking on egg shells around me! I'm not the one in the I.C.U., Danny needs me right now. I should be there for him.' She looked down at her stomach, resting her hands across her bandages.

Lisa had no words of comfort for her little sister, right now, just being there was all she could do. The moment didn't last long as their mother and Lindsay's doctor returned.

'Lindsay, I see you are awake and alert. That's good. How are you feeling?' Dr. Murphy looked at Lindsay, the colour was back in her face and she looked stronger then the day previous.

'Better. How is Danny?' Lindsay asked looking down at her hands.

'Actually I have good some news. His pressure has come back up considerably, and his vitals are looking stronger. This doesn't mean he is out of the woods yet, but it's a clearing.' Dr. Murphy sounded cheerful as the change in events.

'Can I see him?' Lindsay said with a small smile present at the corner of her mouth.

'Not yet, we'll get you up and moving soon. Right now, you need rest.' He said with a comforting tone. 'Lindsay, I have something I need to speak to you about.' He pulled a stool to the side of the bed resting the chart on his knee.

'I lost the baby, didn't I?' Lindsay said quietly.Dr. Murphy looked up in surprise.

'So you did you know that you were pregnant before the attack?' He asked.

'What?' Lindsay's mother brought a hand to her mouth as Lisa shushed her.

'I had an idea, I just kept putting it off.' Letting out a loud sigh she continued. 'How far along?'

'O.B. nurse said about five weeks. The trauma to your abdomen caused your blood pressure to drop, the blood flow to the uterus is very sensitive. You lost the baby during your surgery. I'm very sorry.' He said resting his hand on her knee. 'This doesn't mean you won't be able to conceive again, there was no physical damage to the uterus, you shouldn't have a problem. I'm sorry for your loss, I know this must be hard for you to hear.'

With no words left to speak, Lindsay looked up through teary eyes and smiled. 'Thank you Doctor.'

'I'll come get you when you can see Danny. Get some sleep.' He said as he exited the room.

'Lindsay...' Her mother said before Lindsay cut her off.

'Can I have a minute alone please?' Lindsay said pulling a pillow into her lap. 'I just need some time.' She said as a tear fell from her eye.

'We'll be right outside if you need us?' Lisa said as she escorted her mother from the room. Once the room was empty Lindsay leaned forward into the pillow and began to cry. They were soft tears at first, then they grew stronger, harder until she gasped for breath between sobs. The stress finally bringing her to her breaking point, she cried for Danny, she cried for her baby and she cried for her broken body. She needed to be near him, to smile him, to feel him. She needed him to know that she was sorry. She was sorry.


	7. Chapter 7

With nothing to go off of but the Messer family name, Flack decided it was time to start knocking on some doors. Most of the Messer family was estranged and had not spoken in years, after talking with most of Danny's closest family members, he had decided to go a little more distant hoping for answers. Walking up the stairs of an old brownstone building in Brooklyn Flack stopped at a landing and took a breathe. '_I'm not stopping Dan-o._' He said to himself before continuing up to the forth floor. The last apartment in the hallway belong to Danny's second cousin Lucas Messer, he was a lot younger then Danny, and by his arrest records, half as smart.

Flack stood in front of the door and knocked loudly, he could hear someone inside but no one was answering.

'Mr. Messer, I know you're home I talked to your neighbours.' He bluffed hoping he'd answer. Within seconds the door knob clicked and the door opened slowly.

'Yeah? What do you want?' The kid said looking out the chained door.

'Det. Flack, I'm here to talk about your cousin Danny Messer.' Flack said as he flashed his badge to the kid.

'Listen I don't know anything alright.' He said as he tempted to shut the door as Flack stuck his shoe in the door.

'Whoa, you don't even know what I'm looking for. Why don't you open the door?' He said pushing the door open. The kid looked up at Flack, he was considering his options.

'Alright... fine.' He said shutting the door and removing the chain. Opening the door he stood back and let Flack past.

'Nice place.' Flack said looking around the messy twenty-something male apartment. Lucas Messer stood before him wearing a ratty pair of ripped jeans and no shirt.

'What do you want?' He asked with a snarky tone.

'Have you heard about what happened to your cousin?' Flack said turning around facing the kid.

'Yeah he got shot. Why are you here? Shouldn't you be off finding the person that shot him?' He said crossing his arms.

'Yeah, that would be why I'm here.' He said pulling a notepad from his pocket. 'Tell me about the relationship you have with your cousin Anthony?' He said looking down at the pad then back up at Lucas.

'Excuse me?' He said stepping forward.

'Did I studder? Tell me about your cousin Anthony.' He said in his sarcastic tone.

'There is nothing to tell, we're family. What does this have to do with Anthony?' He said confusion spread wide across his form.

'He is responsible for the assault of one detective and he is the reason Danny's been shot in the chest.' Flack was getting angry at the attitude this kid had for Danny.

'Don't you mean allegedly? Where's your proof?' He said reaching into his pocket and pulling out a cigarette and lighting it.

'My proof is the eye witness who also happens to be a decorated officer.' Flack was angry.

'Yeah right, cops taking care of cops. I see how it is.' He said leaning back against the back of his couch taking a drag of his smoke.

'I might be mistaken, but you don't seem to give a shit about your cousin, who also happens to be a cop?' Dropping his hands to his side he walked closer to the kid.

'Yeah, my Pig cousin. I haven't talked to that slim in years. So he's a cop? Does that make him a God or somethin'? Well in our family, that makes you scum!' He said blowing smoke into Flacks face.

'Funny, the only scum I've seen in this family, I'm lookin' at. Your favorite cousin, Anthony, by the way also attempted to rape a Det. Monroe before she shot him in the chest.' He said getting in his face. 'Whose the scum now?'

'No she didn't.' He said moving from the couch and away from a menacing Flack. 'She didn't shoot him, I heard she shot Danny. Where's Anthony?' He said as he dropped his smoke.

'Anthony? Oh I'm sure he's on a nice cold slab at the morgue right now. One bullet straight to the heart... real hero that one. Gets his ass kicked by a woman all while failing at raping her. I can see why you love him.' Flack said as he followed Lucas as he backed away.

'You're lying!' Lucas said backing into a wall.

'No I'm not. I don't lie about good things.' Flack said standing back from the kid. 'Tell me why you want Danny and his parents dead?'

'What, his parents? I don't want them dead! I mean, yeah, Danny and I aren't exactly close or friendly, but I'd never have him killed. Especially his parents, Aunt Lynne and Uncle Louie practically raised me!' Lucas yelled, clearly upset but the allegations.

'Then why would Anthony break into his apartment and attempt to murder him and kidnap his parents? Why?' Flack raised his voice. There was no time to be nice. Not anymore.

'I... I don't really know.' He stammered out.

''Really know'? What does that mean?' Flack clenched his teeth. Anger was rising.

'Listen, I may not get along with Danny, but Tony hated him. Loathed would be a better word. When His father died a couple months ago, he left everything to his wife and Danny. He was really close with Danny, and well Tony was pretty much a low level criminal who never held down a job. Him and his father hated each other, so when he left Danny most of his money, let's just say Tony was a little more then just upset.' He looked up and cleared his throat. 'Look he steals, and you know takes bets from people, I never thought he'd try to kill him!'

'Where would he take his parents?' Flack asked taking him by his shoulders.

'That much I don't know. I talk to Tony like once a month, no one in this shitty family is close anymore. It isn't always true what they say about Italian families.' He said, clearly upset by the conversation. 'Is Danny going to be ok?' He asked in a shy manor.

'I honestly don't know.' Flack looked at his feet and took a breathe. 'Listen, can you come to the station and make statement about this? Maybe you can think of some places your cousin hung out or some friends he kept over the years?' Flack asked, knowing it wouldn't be his choice, but it was nice to ask.

'Yeah, yeah I can do that.' He said walking towards his dresser and grabbed a shirt. 'You know... what I said before about Danny? I'd never wish death on him, I hope he makes it.' He said as Flack nodded to the young man, as they left the apartment.

'Me too.' Flack said leading him down the hall.

* * *

The ventilator sat in Danny's mouth feeding him air, they had stopped giving him blood units but his pressure was still low and he was still unconscious. Lindsay had been wheeled in next to the bed where she sat holding his hand, afraid to speak, or to hurt him she sat silently staring at his motionless body. His chest was bandaged from surgery, he had multiple I.V. tubes and tubes coming from his chest cavity. His skin was pale and his fingers were cold. Tears silently fell down her face as she waited for his blue eyes to open. Lindsay herself was still weak, she only walked when Doctors let her, she was still in recovery after all, but she could feel herself getting stronger. Danny however was not. '_Any day now. Any day now._' Lindsay told herself over and over, unable to speak.

'Lindsay?' She heard from behind, she turned in her neck to see who was there.

'Mac, what are you doing here?' She asked as Mac came behind her and placed his hands on her shoulders.

'Came to check up on you. How is he?' Mac said giving her shoulder and comforting squeeze as her brought her hand to his and patted it. It helped having friends when she needed them, right now, she needed them.

'Same.' She said softly, 'His fingers are so cold.' She said without taking her eyes off of Danny.

'He's fighting hard.' Mac said moving to Danny's side and holding his other hand. 'Flack has a lead. Looks like a family vendetta. He's checking it out.' Lindsay nodded, she didn't care anymore. Her only thoughts were of Danny.

'How are you feeling?' Mac said looking from her to Danny.

'I'm getting better, don't worry about me.' She said leaning forward in the chair hissing silently in pain.

'Of course I'm worried about you.' He said letting go of Danny's hand and moving to the front of Lindsay's chair. leaning down he took her hand in his. 'Stella told me about the pregnancy. Do you want to talk about it?' Lindsay let tear fall as she looked down to her and Mac's intertwined fingers.

'How can I grieve for someone I didn't even know existed?' She said wiping more tears away. 'I didn't even know I was pregnant and I still feel like I've failed him. Again!' She said looking up at Mac's warm eyes. 'I failed him! How am I going to tell him?'

'It's ok to grieve. I don't think Danny would consider what you did that day a failure, and I definitely don't think he'd be angry about it. It's not your fau...' Lindsay cut him off.

'If you say it's not my fault one more time, I'm going to start screaming profanities that would make sailors blush! EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS IS MY FAULT!' She screamed in his face. Mac had no words, all he could do was watch her struggle. 'Danny is in a coma, because of me! I shot him! Then I killed his baby!'

'Hey, wait a second. You killed his baby? No, Anthony Messer killed his baby, by punching you in the stomach so hard he burst your spleen. He is who holds the blame here. For Danny, for what's happened to you. I'm sorry this is happening to you Lindsay, but it's happening to you, not because of you.' He finished by pulling her into a heart felt hug. Lindsay finally coming to her senses leaned forward into his shoulder and began to cry. The moment was shortened by the sound of a heart monitor beeping faster then normal.

'Danny? No, no! Danny!' Lindsay yelled as doctors and nurses came into the room and began working on him. Mac pulled Lindsay back out of the way as he held her in place, worried she might get in the way.

'V.P. falling, 90 over 50...' A nurse called out as Dr. Benson entered the room and began working.

'Detective, I need you to step out, please?' He said pushing past Lindsay and Mac.

'No! What's wrong with him? Help him!' Lindsay yelled as she stood from her chair and tempted to run to the bed, Mac stopping her before she could get anywhere as he sat her back down and rolled her from the room.

'Mac, no! I want to watch, what's happening to him?' She yelled from the chair as Mac closed the door behind them, not before hearing his heart monitor flat line.


	8. Chapter 8

Lucas Messer sat at the metal table in the small interrogation room, his knee jumped as he sat nervously waiting for Flacks return. Flack watched through the mirrored glass, unconvinced of his innocence. Watching the young man he thought of Danny laying in the hospital hanging by a string as he searched for answers to this horrific crime. Taking a breath he decided to enter and turn the screws on the young Messer, willing the answers to come.

'We got a lot to talk about Lucas.' He sat dropping a file onto the table taking a seat across from him.

'Call me Luke.' He said nervously looking to Flack.

'Is that right, 'Luke'? Does that make us buddies?' Flack said leaning back in his chair and placing his feet onto the table relaxing his body.

'I mean, well only my Mother calls me Lucas, so… you know.' Fear was present in his voice. 'I already told you what I know, I thought I could leave?' He said folding his hands in his lap.

'Yeah that's what you said. See the problem is… you lied to me, and I don't like liars, Luke.' Saying his name in a harsh tone, he moved his body from the comfortable position to face him.

'What… what are you talking about?' Luke cleared his throat, with a kink in his brow he looked up at Flack.

'You said you only talk to your cousin, Tony, once a month. Well, your phone records show that you talked to him at least three times a day for the past two months.' Flack opened the file and pulled a paper out, placing it in front of Luke. 'Now what could have been so important you needed to talk to him that often? And at three-thirty in the morning, the same day Danny and his girlfriend were brutally attacked?' Flack stared him in the eye, with no emotion across his face, he struggled to keep his heart at bay.

'It's not like that, alright… I swear!' He said getting scared.

'I'm going to ask you this nicely only once, then we're going to have problems. Where are Lynne and Louie Messer?' Flack said as he stood up and walked around the table. 'Where?' He asked again with anger in his tone.

'I… I don't…' Before he could finish, Flack grabbed him by the shirt and pulled his off of his chair.

'I SAID DON'T LIE TO ME!' Flack screamed as he pulled him backward sending his flat against the wall behind.

'Listen, none of this wast my idea, ok! It's was Tony! It was all him, he was obsessed!' He yelled as tears ran down his face.

'With what?' Flack yelled with equal intensity.

'Tony wanted the money his father left Danny. He never said anything about killing him! He was going to keep his parents hostage until Danny paid up! I never thought it would go this far. Besides that bitch wasn't even supposed to be there, she fucked the whole thing up!' He yelled as Flack stared at him, considering his options, he went with his gut instinct and punched him in the stomach. As Lucas gasped in pain, Flack dropped him to the floor.

'Where would he keep his parents? If you say 'I don't know' one more time, I'm gonna start knockin' teeth out.' Flack said with clenched fists.

'He… there were a couple places, I don't know the addresses but I can show them to you. I swear to God, I'll show you.' He said as Flack bent down above him, he flinched away, leaning close he whispered in his ear.

'You better pray they make it out of this alive, because even God won't be able to help you.' He finished with a menacing glow across his complexion. 'Get up. You're going to show me, if you're playin' me this little display will be nothing compared to the ass kickin' I'm layin' down!' He said grabbing a handful of his shirt and pulling him to his feet and cuffing his wrists.

* * *

Mac and Lindsay stood outside the I.C.U. in silence as Danny's life stood hanging in the balance. There were no words left to say, no words of confidence to convince one another that he would make it out of this situation in one piece. The only thing they could do is stand, hand in hand, and pray. They may not to God, maybe not to some other higher being, but they prayed that something would save him; let it be a doctor or himself.

Looking to Lindsay, Mac knew that if he did not pull through there would be no consoling for her. He did not know how she would react. If she chose to live, she would have to deal with the fact that she killed her best friend and soul mate, he knew she wasn't truly to blame, but she would never except that. If she chose to let go and end her own life, she had to choose between life and death, something Mac was not willing to think about.

After some time the doors to the I.C.U. opened, a small nurse came out and walked up to where they waited.

'Detectives?' She asked, as they looked to her.

'How is he?' Mac asked, knowing Lindsay could not find her voice at the moment.

'Dr. Benson will be out in a moment to speak with you.' She said squeezing Mac's forearm.

'Wait, what does that mean?' Fear hit him hard, _Why won't she tell me what's going on_? He thought to himself, knowing Lindsay thought the same.

'He'll be out shortly.' She said retreating to the nursing station.

Lindsay looked up at Mac with tears running down her face. Without words, he gave Lindsay's hand a light squeeze as the doors opened once again as Dr. Benson returned.

'What's going on?' Mac said quickly before he had a chance to speak.

'Det. Taylor, he's stable.' He said plainly as Mac left out a large breath of relief and Lindsay began to cry. 'There was a blood clot just above his Aortic Valve… it was quite large. This happens a lot of time after heart surgery, we've thinned his blood and we are keeping an extremely close watch on him. This isn't uncommon; with this type of injury we anticipated complications.' Dr. Benson said, folding his arms over his chest.

'He gave us all a scare, but like I said, he's stable now.'

'Thank you for taking care of him.' Mac said holding out his hand, as Dr. Benson shook it in return. 'Can we see him?'

'Not yet, I'll have a nurse come and get you when he is ready for visitors again.' He said as he turned to leave.

'Thanks again, Dr. Benson.' Mac said as he walked back into the I.C.U.

Turning his attention back to a sobbing Lindsay he leaned down in front of her chair.

'He's alright.' He said putting a finger under her chin, forcing her to look at him. 'He's alright.' He repeated as Lindsay nodded, staring at Mac she began to cry again as he pulled her into another firm hug.

Mac's phone began to ring in his pocket as he pulled away from Lindsay to answer.

'Taylor?' He answered.

'Mac, it's Stella. D.N.A. from the Messer's kitchen came back as canine. Did his parents have a dog?' Stella asked curiously.

Turning his attention back to Lindsay, thinking she of all people would know.

'Did Danny's parents have a dog?'

'Yeah, a German Shepard named Rocco. Why?' She said as Mac turned back to his phone.

'Did you hear that?' Mac said, without repeating.

'Yeah, so maybe Rocco got a bite at the kidnappers. Flack has Lucas Messer in custody right now, he knows something. I'll give him a call and tell him to check our perp for any dog bites.' Stella said as Mac closed his phone.

'We have a lead on Danny's parents. Hopefully we can find them before Danny wakes up.' He finished as Lindsay stared on, hoping he would in fact wake up. 'Come on, let's get you back to bed.' Lindsay gave a nod as they continued down the hall to her room.

* * *

**Hey Guys, I just want to tell you that I really appreciate all of your reviews. It makes me want to keep writing. If you keep reviewing I'll keep updating:D**

**Thanks again!**

**Trix.**


	9. Chapter 9

Lindsay's hospital room was quiet, just the sound of her own breathing filled the room as she lay on her back staring out at a dark city beyond the window. With her hands resting on her bandaged stomach she felt the pain across her body, she refused pain killers as part of her punishment. In her mind she deserved the pain, she deserved every second of it. She hated herself for not being able to touch his face, or kiss his lips. She hated herself for not being able to protect herself or him. Most of all she missed him; though he wasn't far away, he was a world apart. Moving her hands across her abdomen, she wondered what it would have been like to have his child. If the baby would have his beautiful blue eyes and blond hair, a smile formed on across her lips as she thought about them as a family.

'There is something I haven't seen in awhile.' Her mother said standing in the doorway.

'Mom?' Lindsay said with surprise turning her attention to her mother, 'I thought you went to the hotel?' She asked sitting up in bed.

'No, I got half way there and remembered where I was needed.' She moved into the room next to Lindsay's bed putting the coffee in her hands to the table next to the bed. 'What were you smiling about?'

'Danny.' She answered with another smile. 'I was thinking about what a great Dad he would have been.' She said looking up at her mother who was now perched at the side of her bed.

'Yes, he will. You'll make a great mother yourself... but you do have a lot to live up to!' She said with a smile.

'Yeah, I guess so.' Lindsay said as her smiles faded.

'Oh hunny.' Her mother said, taking her daughter's hand in hers.

'All he ever cared about was taking care of me, and all I did was push him away. You know what we fought about before this happened?' Lindsay asked as her mother shrugged. 'He wanted me to move in, and I said I wasn't ready. Can you believe that? I was afraid to move forward, of commitment. Now all I want to do is hold him, and be near him.' She finished as she shook her head and looked down at herself.

'Lindsay...' Her mother said, but Lindsay interrupted.

'I was pushing him away, and all he wanted me to do was relax. He was taking care of me and he wasn't even near me. 'Take the day Montana, I got this.'' She mocked his voice. 'If I didn't break that stupid picture, I wouldn't have even been there, and then none of this would have happened! Take the day... yeah I guess I took it.' She said with a sarcastic laugh.

Lindsay's mother lifted her daughter from the bed and wrapped her arms around her, in a time like this the only thing she needed was her mother, and she was there.

'I need him back, Mum.' Lindsay said as she cried. 'I need him.' She repeated as she cried into her mother's neck.

* * *

Lucas Messer had taken Flack to five different spots around Staten Island, none of which held the Older Messer couple. Flack's patience was wearing thin and he trekked through old warehouses and garages. Upon the last place they were checking before Flack moved on to a different plan his cell phone began to ring in his pocket. Pulling it out he say '_Stella Bonesera_' on the I.D. 

'Hey Stella, I got nothing.' He said without a _Hello_.

'I figured as much. Do me a favour and check the kid for dog bites.' Stella asked in a stern voice.

'Ok, why?' Flack asked looking to Lucas who stood with a uniformed officer with cuffs on his wrists.

'Humor me.' She answered sarcastically as Flack moved toward his prisoner.

'Pant leg... lift it now.' He said with his phone to his side.

'Why?' He asked slyly as Flack took another step closer.

'Lift it now, or I will and I won't be gentle.' He said moving dangerously close to his face. Lucas stood in fear for a second, then bent forward and lifted his pant leg revealing a partially scabbed cuts around both ankles.

'Stella he has cuts on both ankles, definitely could be dog bites. What's going on?' Before he could finish Lucas pushed the officer to the ground and began sprinting down the street, Flack hot on his heals.

'Where ya going kid?' He yelled after him, calling to the uniform cops for backup.

Though his hands were cuffed, he ran as fast as his feet could carry him. Turning off a street to an alley way, he ran full steam but was blocked by a locked gate at the end. Flack caught up, with his gun in hand, he aimed at the young kid.

'Lucas stop! Where you gonna go?' He yelled as Lucas began to pace back and forth.

'I can't go to jail. I can't.' He was scared, Flack knew this. He was a young kid whose life was being taken away from him.

'I can work something out for you, but you have to help me!' Flack said without moving his gun.

'You don't understand! I didn't have a choice, he was going to kill me if I didn't help him. This is so messed up. Oh man, this is messed up.' He said to Flack as tears ran down his face.

'Listen, I understand, but if you don't tell me where I can find Lynne and Louie Messer are you're going to jail for a long time. They aren't going to give you any deals unless you help us. If the Messer's die, they won't care. You'll get a nice hot needle right there in your arm and you'll go to sleep forever. Now... what's it gonna be, kid?' Flack said as he lowered his gun.

'I never wanted to hurt anyone, I just wanted money to go to school. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry.' Lucas said as he dropped to his knees in surrender, tears rushing down his cheeks.

'I'll help you out, but right now you gotta tell me where they are. It's been two days, if they are injured they may not have much time left.' He said leaning down next to him with a hand on his shoulder.

'They weren't hurt. I never touched them. The damn dog isn't doing to great though, when he bit me Tony stabbed him. I think he's dead.' He said looking up at Flack. 'He told me to take them to a factory that his father used to work at, it's been abandoned for years it's in Brooklyn. I'll show you.' He finished.

'No more lies?' Flack asked.

'No more lies, but you promise to help me?' Lucas shook with fear.

'If they are where you say they are, I will do what I can with the D.A.' Flack looked down, 'I swear if...' He began before Lucas cut him off.

'I'm not. I'll show you.' He said looking up with a sincere look of remorse on his face. 'I'll show you.'


	10. Chapter 10

The empty factory stood dark and tall in the low street lights that hung out front of the building eluminating the monstrous building. Flack, Stella, Mac and Hawkes stood with vests on and guns in hand as they entered the building. This was the only address Lucas Messer gave them, with no other choice, they stormed the building with flash lights and guns in hand.

Moving between old machinery and garbage, hope hung in the air as they looked for a possibly hiding spot for the older couple. Stella walked in a fast motion across an old floor, she heard a creak beneath her, moving her gaze to the floor she noticed a small door in the floor that was half covered by an old table.

'Guys! Over here!' She yelled out, bringing the attention to the rest of the team to where she stood.

'What do we got Stel?' Mac said jogging over to wear she stood.

'What do you think? Think people could fit down there?' She asked motioning towards the door.

'Let's find out.' He said as they were joined by Flack and Hawkes.

'Help me out here.' He said as the three men moved the heavy table off of the door. Once it was clear, they took their guns from their holsters and prepared for anything. Mac moved down and slowly opened the door.

'Mr. and Mrs. Messer?' Stella yelled out loud, when no one answered she leaned down pointing the flashlight in the hole. 'Hello? Any one there?' She repeated looking around. Standing back up she turned to Mac.

'I'm going down there. They might be afraid and are hiding, I have to check it out.' With no objects, Stella moved to lower herself in the hole.

Letting her feet dangle for a moment she dropped the short distance to the ground beneath her. Pulling her gun out once more she moved around the area searching for anyone or thing that could be there. Seeing that it looked empty, she went to the edges of the room.

At the farthest end of the room there was a small door, without fear she jogged towards and and pulled it as hard as she could. It wouldn't budge. Looking around she saw a lock on the handle, picking up a rock she began to beat it hoping to break it.

'Mac, I need something to cut this lock!' She yelled out as she heard someone drop into the room as well. Suddenly Hawkes stood behind her with large bolt cutters.

'Will these work?' He asked as he moved to cut the lock off of the door. Once it was free they began to pull the door open; being so old it took much strength.

'Hello?' Stella yelled pointing the flashlight inside. This time something caught her eye, the blond glow of hair reflected off the light.

'Mrs. Messer!' She yelled entering the small room. The older couple sat beside one another hand in hand as Stella rushed in the room to help them.

'Oh thank god! Thank god!' Mrs. Messer said joyfully as she wrapped her arms around Stella's neck.

'Are you hurt?' Stella asked checking over her body.

'No we're alright. Just damn hungry.' Mr. Messer said attempting to stand.

'Alright, we're going to get you out of here.' Stella said as she helped them to their feet, as Hawkes approached them to help them out of the room.

'Where is Danny? He said he was going after him. Where is Daniel?' Mrs. Messer asked frantically.

'We'll take you to him. Let's get you to the hospital to get you checked over. Alright?' Stella said, not ready to answer her questions. Drapping her arm over her shoulder she helped her out of the room.

'Take me to him? Where is my son? What did they do to him?' She said stopping in her tracks. Mr. Messer came up from behind.

'What's happened?' He asked as well. Knowing they needed answers, Stella and Hawkes exchanged looks and began to explain.

'He's been shot. They are taking good care of him, but he is in critical condition. We'll take you to him.' Hawkes said in a mellow tone.

'Shot? How bad is it? Really, and don't give me the short answer. I've been stuck in the dark far too long!' Mr. Messer said, anger present in his voice.

'Mr. Messer, he's in intensive care. He was shot in the heart. Like I said, they are taking good care of him.' Hawkes said, as the Doctor in him took over.

'Oh, my baby!' Mrs. Messer yelled out in shock. 'No! He said he was going to bring him back and we'd have to watch him die! He never came back! Oh my poor Danny.' She yelled as she turned to cry into her husbands shoulders.

Stella and Hawkes stood back and watched them fall apart, behind them she felt Flack enter the room as a latter dropped down into the room. Watching the display, they all wore guilt on their faces as the older couple grieved for their injured son. Finding the courage, Flack stepped forward and rested a hand on Danny's mother's shoulder.

'Let us take you to him.' He said softly as she broke away from her husband and gave a nod, as the team led them from the factory to an awaiting ambulance.

* * *

After a shower and a warm meal, Lynne and Louie Sr. walked into the small, dimly lite room that housed their only living son. The soft beeps of his heart monitor sent chills down their spines as the slowly stepped into the room, hand in hand. With what strength they had left they moved to either side of his bed, taking each of his hands they held on to him. Their son, who was holding onto life by a thread. Not taking notice to a quiet Lindsay, who sat in the corner watching the display in front of her as silent tears rolled down her cheeks. 

'Oh god.' Lynne said, as she brought her free hand to her mouth letting out a sob. 'How could this happen?' She asked, who she was asking was unknown.

Louie Sr. had no words, his job was to keep strong and he was determined to do so. He stood silently watching machines breathe for his son, while his wife slowly fell apart. Holding his head high, he knew deep down it was not Danny's time, he was fighting too hard to let go. After the conversation with Dr. Benson it was apparent that he did not have much hope for him waking, but Louie Sr. knew better.

Hearing a light sob from behind, he turned to see a very broken Lindsay Monroe sitting in a chair in the corner.

'Lindsay?' He said as the couple both turned to see her crying.

'Oh Lindsay!' Lynne said moving across the room and kneeling down beside Lindsay. 'Hunny, your face!' She said running her fingers down her face. In the events of the last two days Lindsay had forgotten about her stitches and bruises that covered her skin from the attack; moving her own hand to her face she squeezed Lynne's hand with hers. 'How are you doing sweetheart?' Lynne asked looking into her eyes.

'I'm sorry, I'm so sorry.' Without any words, she pulled Lindsay into a hug. His mother knew there was nothing to forgive, but she let her be forgiven any ways.

* * *

Flack entered the station exhausted, his mind and body were tested to their limits in the last three days and he desperately needed a break. At first he thought finding Danny's parents and bringing them home safely was going to make him feel better, but that was not the case. Finding them made him feel better, but it was short lived. His best friend still laid in a coma on life support.

Walking past an interrogation room, he stopped and looked down. Taking a deep breathe he turned back to the room and opened the door. Entering he found Lucas, sitting at the table with his arms wrapped around his legs, Flack noticed how young he looked suddenly. Taking a seat across from him he rested his hands on the table as both men stared at one another, they had both shared the same stress, though on different ends of the spectrum, they both ached from it.

'You found them?' Lucas said, breaking the silence.

'Yes. They are both alright, they've been treated and released from the hospital.' Flack answered plainly.

'Good... that's good. And... Danny?' He said shyly, afraid of the answer.

'No change.' He said noticing the tears resting on the lids of his eyes.

'I'm sorry Det. Flack. I'm sorry I gave you a run around. I was afraid.' He said looking at the table, shame was making it difficult to look him in the eyes.

'I thought you should know, we located the money that Tony's father left Danny.' He let out an audible sigh. 'Danny put it in a Registers Savings Account... it's under your name.' Flack finished as Lucas' eyes shot up to meet his.

'What?' He said as the tears finally made their way down his cheeks.

'Apparently Danny believed in you; thought you could do something with your life.' He said on the verge of tears himself. 'Why did you do this Luke?'

'I'm... I...' He couldn't think. 'I didn't think anyone would help me. When I told my family I wanted to go to art school, they laughed at me, called me a '_faggot_'.' I didn't think anyone cared. So when Tony came up to me and asked me if I wanted to make some quick cash I thought it was a good idea. By the time I realized what we were doing, I tried to back out but he told me he'd kill me of I didn't follow through. I was scared, so I did what I was told. I didn't have anyone to go to for help!' He finished.

'You were wrong. You had Danny, it didn't have to come to this.' Flack said coldly.

'I'm sorry, I didn't think... I'm sorry.' He said as his tears became sobs.

'Well now you have a lot of time to think about it.' Flack said getting up from the table. 'I've informed the D.A. that you were helpful with the investigation, but that is as far as I go. Danny was right, you could have been something, something great, but now we may never know. Pray that he wakes up, and not just for your sake, for his. Good bye Lucas.' Flack said as he stood and left the room, leaving Lucas in a pile of tears and regret.


	11. Chapter 11

Finishing up the case, the team returned to the hospital; Danny had been moved to a private room, he was still sedated with a ventilator keeping making sure that he kept breathing. Flack, Stella, Hawkes and Mac walked down the long hallway to where Danny lay unconscious, with tired minds, tired eyes, and tired hearts they entered the small room. Without announcement they watched as Lindsay and his mother sat beside his bed holding his cold fingers in their hands. Danny's father, Louie Sr. stood in the corner watching and waiting for any sign of life.

Taking notice of the team in the door way, he moved towards them slowly, extending his hand he shook Mac's.

'I can't tell you how grateful I am.' He said as he shook Flack's hand, then Sheldon's, then Stella's. 'Thank you, my Family thanks you.' He said with tears in their eyes, without words, the team forced smiles and gave him a comforting nod. Louie smiled and returned to the chair sitting in the corner.

The team had done anything they could do for Danny, now it was up to him. Standing at the end of the bed they created a circle around his bed, all of their hopes and prays going out to him, they waited for him. If it took he days, weeks, or months they all knew he would come back to them. He was stubborn, he would do it on his own time, in his own way.

After twenty minutes, the silence was broken by movement as Lindsay moved from her seat. Standing up, she was uneasy on her feet as she moved to Danny's face and placed a soft kiss above his temple. Moving back she ran her hand over his hair and whispered softly in his ear. 'Stay with me Danny, stay with me.' She said as she rested her forehead against his. 'Stay with me.' She repeated as tears fell from her closed eyes.

The room was silent with quiet tears as they watched the painful display as Lindsay's tears dropped to Danny's slumbering face. Knowing that they may not he may not have much time left, the team locked hands and prayed silently. '_Stay with us Danny, Stay with us.'_ They thought as they prayed to save their friend. '_Stay._'


	12. Chapter 12

It had been three weeks since Anthony Messer had broken through Danny's door; Danny had been in critical condition most of the time, but had now been downgraded. Though he was still unconscious he was breathing on his own and, from what the doctors say, he is 'Resting Comfortably.'

Danny's mother was with them often, she was driving Lindsay mad. Coming into Danny's hospital room, she would begin to move things around and fuss with Danny's hair. Stilling beside him, she would talk his unconscious ear off. Lindsay sat watching her with her hand over her mouth, hiding her smile. She laughed to herself, knowing Danny would have been rolling his eyes or saying some sarcastic comment, she knew he would enjoy the scene before her.

Lynne was in the middle of explaining how to save money at the grocery store when Lindsay needed a break, looking up from her book she let out a loud sigh. Lynne noticed and stopped talking.

'What's wrong?' She said quizzically.

'You need to take a break.' Lindsay said plainly.

'Oh, no, no... I'm fine dear.' She said as she continued to knit.

'No. You need to go for a walk or get a coffee, or something. Just... take a break.' Lindsay said dropping her hands to her lap.

'I can't help but think you are trying to get rid of me, Lindsay!' She said with a laugh, which quickly disappear as Lindsay's face stayed serious. 'Oh... I take it that you are.' She said looking disappointed.

'It's not that Lynne.' She explained taking a breath. 'He needs some quiet time too. Please don't be offended, I don't mean you are annoying me. I just think Danny needs some space and some silence... just for a bit.' She said, trying to sound as sweet as possible.

'You're probably right, I'm been a little extra chatty haven't I?' She said putting her knitting needle on the table beside Danny's bed, and standing up. 'Well, if you need me I have my cell on. Can I get you anything?' She said moving behind Lindsay and putting a hand on her shoulder.

'Nothing money can buy... thanks though.' She smiled as Lynne kissed the top of her head as Lindsay's hand came up to rest on the hand on her shoulder. Lindsay closed her eyes as she kissed the top of her head, she felt warm knowing she now had two mothers to care about her. With a smile, Lynne quietly left the room.

Finally surrounded by silence Lindsay, stood up and moved the blankets around Danny's sleeping frame and moved his hair from his forehead. Leaning down and kissing his lips softly she returned to her seat. Danny looked as if he was sleeping, apart from the I.V. tubing in his hands, and wires attached to his torso that kept the rhythmic sound of his heart echo through the room. His hands rested across his chest with his pulse-ox cuff on his index finger, he slept as his chest rose and fell, the only sign of life left to him.

Sitting back in her seat Lindsay, who had been silent while Lynne rambled about nonsense, thought about his voice. Closing her eyes, she listened to the memory of his tone and began to talk back.

'I had to get rid of your mother. I love her and all, but god can that woman chat. I think anyone that can sit and listen to that for a long time has gotta be a good friend.' She laughed and continued. 'I do love her though, your parents are absolutely amazing people Danny. They are kind and gentle, they make this a little bit easier.' She took a breath and opened her eyes, watching Danny, she envisioned his eyes. His bright blue eyes, which she had only seen during the doctors examinations in the last three weeks. She missed them. She missed him and he was only two feet away. 'I miss you Danny.' She said quietly as she dropped her gaze to her lap.

In the past three weeks she had given herself time to heal and time to cry; she was no longer in tears at the look of his pale skin. She knew she had to be strong for him, strong for herself. When she thought about falling apart she would think of happy memories and push past the hard ship, she knew it wouldn't last, Danny would come back to her. He had to.

Taking a breath she picked up her book and began to read, not noticing the small movements only a few feet away. His hands felt cold and stiff as he moved them slowly across his chest to his face. Attempting to touch his dry lips, something plastic poked his cheek. Confusion flashed over him as his eyes slowly opened. The room was dimly lite but the brightness burned. His mouth was dry, his skin was crawling and his eyes felt heavy. Moving arm he felt pain through his chest and let out a very faint moan.

Lindsay's eyes shot up from her book to see Danny slowly moving with his eyes open as he took long deep breaths. Jumping to her feet, she moved to his shaking hand. Taking his hand she wrapped her hand in his, and stroked his hair.

'Danny?' She said softly. 'It's Lindsay, baby.'

Without words Danny looked at her, confusion was slowly disappearing as he looked at the woman above him. Reaching across his bed she hit the call button as she stood holding his hand and staring at the eyes she missed more then anything.

'Hey, I've been waiting for you.' She said happily as she kissed his hand and smiled. Unable to speak himself, without the energy to smile, he laid on his pillow with happiness in his heart as he looked into the eyes of the woman he loved. Finally.


	13. Chapter 13

The ache in his chest was very present. Healing seemed to be taking forever, or he was just too impatient. He had been out of a coma for two days, the morphine helped more then he could explain, even though they made him groggy he appreciated the numbness. Lindsay had stayed with him most of the time when she wasn't at home sleeping and taking small breaks, Danny knew she still blamed herself. He hadn't done much to change her mind, he was too tired to chat and was not in the mood to talk about his feelings. He was angry and depressed, but not at Lindsay, he now had a hatred for his own last name. The pain he felt was because of his family, not Lindsay.

Waking up from a mid afternoon nap, he moved to sit up as pain shot through his body, letting out an exsasperated gasp, he noticed he wasn't alone.

'Dan? Can I get you something?' He heard from beside the bed. It was Flack, it must have been his turn to watch me.

'Yeah, next time make sure she kills me.' He answered sarcastically, as he pressed the button in his hand for more pain killers.

'Very funny. Seriously?' He asked again, his tone resting as serious.

'No, no... I'm fine. I just keep forgetting my chest is being held together with wire is all.' He said squeezing his eyes shut against the pain. Taking deep breaths to slow his heart, he finally opened his eyes and looked to his friend. 'I wanna know the details.' He asked quietly.

'About what?' Flack folded his arms over his chest and turned his head to the side.

'What happened to Lindsay and I, I mean I know the physical stuff, but I wanna know about the case.' He asked as the meds started to take affect.

'I don't think that's a good idea, bud.' Flack was not up for upsetting him right now.

'I'm going to find out eventually, I wanna know what's gonna happen to Luke. Come on, please?' Danny said, adding a pouty face for colour.

'He's been arrested on Conspiracy to Commit Murder. I told the A.D.A. for a plea, it seems that Tony threatened him into the situation.' Flack said without too many details.

'So it was all Tony?' Danny asked solemnly.

'You can say that. He was pissed at you for his Father leaving the money to you. I don't think Luke knew what he was getting into.' Flack knew that deep down Luke was a good kid, he felt sorry for him.

'Yeah...' Danny said looking away, guilt hitting him hard. 'I always thought that kid had more in him then petty street crimes. I told him I'd help him out; if he applied to college, I'd find a way to help him get there. I guess he didn't believe me. So stupid.' Danny said as a tear came to his eye.

'It's not your fault.' Flack said putting a hand on his shoulder.

'I know... I don't blame myself, I blame him! How could he be so stupid?' Danny said as anger radiated off of him. 'I'm pissed because he pissed his life away. He's too young for jail!' Flack took notice in Danny's heart monitor and stood up, pulling Danny's attention towards him.

'You need to calm down. Take a breath.' He said calmly to Danny as his heart rate continued to climb. Taking his advice, Danny began to take long deep breaths. Over and Over, he was slowly calming down as the rapid beeps of the machines became slower, and slower.

'Sorry.' Danny said as he let out long breaths.

'Just relax, alright? If your heart stops I really don't want to do mouth to mouth, alright?' Flack said with a smile as Danny let out a laugh, grabbing at his chest.

'Ow, ow... don't make me laugh.' He said as he continued to laugh and hold his chest.

'Alright, alright... Sorry.' Flack said with a smile. After a moment, Danny relaxed again and was laying back on his pilows.

'How's Lindsay doing?' Danny asked.

'She's here all the time, ask her.' Flack was confused, once again.

'I do, she says she's fine, but she won't look me in the eye. She blames herself doesn't she?' Danny said looking turning his body slightly to look at Flack.

'I don't think there is anything I can do to convince her otherwise. You should talk to her, really talk to her. Maybe you can get through to her.' He said as he leaned back in his chair.

'Yeah, maybe. I just can't be the level headed one right now, I don't have the energy to convince her. I wish I did, but I don't.'

'I understand. Why don't you just tell her that?' Flack said in a obvious tone.

'mmhumm... yeah...' Danny said between yawns as his arms fell lazily to his side. The drugs numbing his body, his eyes began to flicker as sleep approached. Standing up, Flack pulled the blankets up his friends body as he drifted back in to a state of unconsciousness once again.

* * *

Hours later, Danny awoke once again. The light from the window was replaced with dark and a glow of yellow light from the street below, the room was dimly lite by a small lamp at the side of his bed. His body shook with cold, as he pulled the blankets up to his shoulders, careful of injured chest. Looking around the room he noticed he was alone for the first time since he woke. Instead of peace and quiet, he suddenly felt afraid. The silence became eery, he could feel his body reacting, as goosebumps ran up his arms and legs, and his body began to shake. He was weak, alone and fear was over taking him, he needed someone near him. Pulling his arm out of the blankets, he quickly pressed the call button, a nurse will do, he needed someone. 

Before a nurse came to the room, Lindsay entered the room. Seeing Danny shaking beneath the hospital blankets, she dropped her bag and moved to the bed. Danny sat with his eyes closed shaking.

'Danny?' She asked through her confusion. 'You okay?'

'Lindsay!' He said excitedly as her reached out to her, pulling her near with what strength he had.

'I'm here. It's alright, Danny? What's wrong?' She asked as he held her, pressing a hand to his forehead. He wasn't overly warm. He seemed fine, except this new fear.

'I thought you were gone. Don't leave okay?' He asked, fear entering his tone without permission.

'I'm not going anywhere. I just had to go get you some new pajamas. Danny I'm right here.' She said as she wrapped her arms around him, feeling him shake she reached down and pulled his chin towards her. 'What's going on?'

'No one was here. The room was empty... I thought... I thought you gave up. Don't leave ok... not yet.' He said sadly. Lindsay noticed tears forming in his eyes, though she was positive it was the pain killers that were making him emotional, she knew where she needed to be.

'I won't leave you Danny. Ever.' She said as she placed a kiss on his forehead. Resting her forehead against his, she watched as Danny closed his eyes and take a breath.

'I don't blame you, Linds.' He said after a couple minutes of silence.

'What?' Lindsay said, shocked at the statement.

'I don't blame you. I'm proud of you for protecting yourself.' He said without opening his eyes. 'I'm sorry I wasn't there for you.'

'Danny...' She said softly as tears came to her eyes. 'I have to tell you something.' She said as she prepared herself.

'What?' Danny said opening his eyes and looking up at her.

'I... Danny... I...' She couldn't find the words suddenly. 'I had a miscarriage.' She blurted out quickly, before she lost her nerve.

'What?' Danny said as his eye grew wider.

'I wasn't keeping it from you, I didn't even know that I was pregnant. I mean, I had an idea... I just felt different... and then this happened, and when he punched me in the stomach... I lost the baby. I just... I... I didn't know... and then it was gone.' Lindsay was talking so fast Danny barely had a second to register what she was saying.

'Lindsay...' Danny said quietly, waiting for her to stop.

'I just wish that I had known before... I wasn't...' She continued.

'Lindsay...'

'I didn't mean to keep things from you... I would never do that. Not after everything we've been through, I just...'

'LINDSAY!' Danny finally yelled as Lindsay looked up at him with tears in her eyes.

'I'm sorry you lost the baby. Are you alright?' Danny asked as he took her hand in his.

'...I... ' Lindsay, no longer able to speak, shook her head as the tear came in at full force.

'Oh baby.' Danny said as he pulled her close as she cried into his shoulder.

'I'm so sorry Danny, I'm sorry about everything. This is my fault.' She cried.

'No, no it's not. It's going to be okay, but you have to stop blaming yourself. None of this is your fault. Besides it kind of works out for me.' Danny said with a smile.

'What, what do you mean?' Lindsay said pulling herself up and looking at Danny.

'I don't think I can ever loose an argument again.'

'What?' Lindsay cocked her head to the side in confusion.

'You shot me in the chest... that basically means I win every fight.' He said with a large smile.

'So not funny!' Lindsay said as she started to laugh and playfully slapped his arm. Taking her face in his hands he pulled her close.

'I love you Lindsay, and I think you will make an amazing mother. I love you.' He said softly, pulling her into a kiss.

'I love you too.' She replied once they separated, and pressed their foreheads together once again, closing their eyes, they sat in each others presence. Never taking each other for granted again.


	14. Chapter 14

Six weeks since Danny had been shot, he was being released from the hospital. He felt stronger even though he still had mild spells of pain, but he was ready to go home. Lindsay had cleaned his apartment with the help of the team, she knew going home to a crime scene would destroy him, for fear of stressing him out she took care of things. His surgeon gave him the go ahead for release the night before and Danny woke up early to get out of there.

Entering his hospital room, she saw that Danny was walking around picking up his things. His I.V. had already been removed and was replaced with a bandage on his wrist. He looked as if he was in a hurry.

'Danny, you're up early.' Lindsay said as she moved to his side and placed a kiss on his cheek.

'Yeah, I've never been one for hospitals, I need to get out of here.' He said stuffing track pants into his bag. 'Are my parents really coming?' He said with disappointment in his tone.

'Yes, and I was not going to be the one to break the news to your mother that she can't.' She said resting a hand on her shoulder.

'I know, I know... but seriously, she breaks down into tears over the smallest things. The other day I couldn't reach a book at the bedside table and she cried for two hours!' He explained as Lindsay started laughing. 'It's not funny!' He said with a smile.

'It's kinda funny.' Lindsay said through her laughter. 'Ok, so your mother is emotional, but this is a big deal for her. Besides, I already told her that you get upset when you see her cry so she should hold back on the tears. A little white lie never hurt anyone.'

'Thanks.' He said as he moved closer to Lindsay and pulled her into a kiss.

'What was that for?' She said as they parted.

'I never want to miss another opportunity to kiss you again.' He smiled as he leaned in a placed a soft kiss against her lips.

'I think I can deal with this new _grab life by the horns_ version of you.' She smiled as she picked up the bag off of his bed and placed it on the floor. 'Now get your ass in bed. You're still a patient.'

'Come on, Linds!' Danny protested as Lindsay gave him a stern look. 'Fine.' He said as he moved onto the bed. 'I miss my own bed, can't wait to just sleep without the sounds of machines.' He said leaning back onto his pillows.

'Just so you know, I'm really good a sponge baths.' She said with a kink in her brow.

'Oh really?' Danny said as she moved to his side and kissed him again. Backing away from the kiss, Danny reached out and held her by her upper arms.

'We should try again.' He said plainly.

'Try for what?' Lindsay asked curiously.

'A baby. We should try to get pregnant.' He had a smile across his face, Lindsay's palms became moist, and her breathing began to speed up.

'What? No, no, no.' She said with more shock in her voice then she intended. 'Danny, we can't. You are still healing and it's just not good timing and I don't think that you should be thinking about this when you haven't even left the hospital yet. I mean...' Lindsay realized that she was the person with the commitment issues this time. She was panicking.

'I see.' Danny said with his mood changing.

'Danny?' She said as he moved back from her.

'Is it the fact that you don't want a baby, or that you don't want a baby with me?' He was clearly hurt.

'It's not that...' This time he cut her off.

'No that must be it, I ask you to move in with me, you say no. You say you aren't ready. You get pregnant, you don't tell me. Now you don't even want to try again. What would you have done if you didn't loose the baby Lindsay?' He looked to her with anger covering his face.

'No... I told you that I didn't even know that I was pregnant! It's not like that.' She said as emotions ran high.

'Then what's it like? What would you have done?' Danny said, his face blank.

'I don't know. I really don't know what I would have done. It's not that I don't want to be with you. I do. I love you!' Lindsay said as her voice cracked. 'I... I just...' She said as Danny started.

'Why are you so afraid of me? Why won't you open up to me?' Danny had tears in his eyes.

After a moment of silence Lindsay finally answered.

'Because... it's because I don't trust you.' She said plainly, unable to look him in the eyes.

Danny couldn't decide what hurt worse, being shot in the chest or watching Lindsay rip his heart out. He ached, she ached. Fear of loosing all control he closed his eyes and took a deep breathe.

'You should go.' He said without looking at her.

'Danny, no.' She protested.

'I don't want you here right now, please... just leave.' He said as his voice began to slip away from him.

'Ok.' She said softly, getting off of the bed and picking up her purse from beside the bed. 'I'm sorry.' She added as she turned to leave the room. Danny turned away from her as a tear escaped her eye. Before she was out of the room, he spoke softly.

'I would never hurt you.' He said as tears began to fall down Lindsay's face.


	15. Chapter 15

Danny sat silently on his hospital bed while his mother scrambled around the room picking up what was left of his things. He hadn't said more then three words in the hour they were there, his mother pretended to be busy to not upset him or herself, and his father took his regular post in the chair in the corner of the room waiting for Danny to speak.

'Lynne, hun?' He finally said drawing the attention of his wife.

'Hum?' She answer not looking up from the pile of clothing that she had folded and refolded a hundred times.

'Can you go get us some coffee? I need a minute.' He said calmly as he got up and crossed the room to his son's bed. Lynne looked from her husband to her son and gave him a nod.

'Sure... yeah, sure. Daniel can I get you anything?' She ask, he didn't respond. 'Danny?' She repeated as he looked up and gave a weak shake of his head. 'Ok, I'll be back.' She said with a smile as she left the room.

Once she was gone, Danny sat staring at his hands as his father stood above him and watched. Taking a breath he moved closer to his son.

'You know when you were small, say about three years old, I had to watch you for an afternoon. Your mother had to take Louie to the doctors and I had to watch you for a couple hours. Just a couple hours, not a lot. You wanted to play catch with me, you were so small. I remember you slept with your baseball glove every night.' He let out a small laugh as Danny looked up at him finally. 'I had worked the night before, grave yard shift, so I was tired and grumpy. I didn't want to play, so I laid on the couch and watched the game. Not twenty minutes into it, and I hear the worst sound in my life. You were screaming. Not that happy scream of a kid having fun, no it was the scream of pain. I got up and ran outside, I found you lying on the grass rocking back and forth holding your arm. To this day I don't know how it happened, but you broke your arm in three places. I picked you up and took you to the hospital. In all that pain, you never cried. Not once.' He said looking down as a tear escaped his eye.

'Dad?' Danny said reaching out putting a hand on his wrist. 'That wasn't your fault.'

'Danny, you were three years old and you didn't want to upset me. You didn't cry once, and you broke your arm in three places. You said '_Daddy, I'm going to be strong for you._' but I should have been strong for you. I should have been watching you. I'm sorry.' He stopped and looked at his youngest son, moving his hand to his face and held onto his cheek. 'You don't always have to be the strong one, kid.'

Danny stared at his father, the man that had been there for him at the important moments in his life. The man that helped raise him, even in his absence. His friend. He was ready to fall apart, but held it together all this time for his family and his friends, when all he wanted was to scream and punch. He wanted to be angry, but he didn't know who to blame. He wanted to scream, scream like he did when he broke his arm all those years ago.

Feeling the tears form in his eyes, he pulled back from his father and wiped them before they escaped. His father cleared his throat, noticing Danny's comfort level changing.

'Where's Lindsay?' He asked.

'Not here. I don't want to talk about it.' His voice cracking a little.

'Alright, you don't have to. She's good for you Danny.' He said looking away from his son.

'Ha, yeah.' Danny said, rolling his eyes and folding his arms against his already sore chest.

'What does that mean?' Louie Sr. said as he sat down on the side of his bed.

'We um... we kind of broke up this morning.' He struggled with the words.

'What? Why?' He said as his face contorted with concern. Danny took a deep breath, unsure if he was ready to talk about it.

'I think I did her a favor.' He said looking up at his father as his long awaited tears came back to his eyes.

'How's that?' His father said leaning forward and handing him a tissue.

'She said she doesn't trust me. After all this bullshit, she doesn't trust me.' He shook his head at the disbelief in his own words.

'I'm sorry, Danny.' He said putting a strong hand on his son's shoulder. After a second he moved closer and pulled his son into a warm hug. Danny began to pull away, but his father squeezed tighter, holding him in place.

Finally giving into his emotions he squeezed his father back, letting tears roll down his cheeks. Burying his eyes into his shoulder he fell apart. Piece by piece, everything that had happened to him the the last two months was catching up to him. He could feel his heart breaking, but this time it was physical. He wanted to go back to that morning and do it all over. He wanted his life back.

'God this sucks!' He said with a chuckle as his father stroked his hair.

'I know, kid.' Louie Sr. said as he held him. 'You've survived the worst of this, you'll get through it. Things have a way of working themselves out.' He said as he pulled back and took his son's face in his hands. 'You're going to be ok, you've stayed with us for a reason.' Danny gave him a small nod as he hugged his father again.

Separating from his son, Louie Sr. stood up and smiled at his son. 'I'm going to give you a minute, I'll find your mother and hold her off for a bit. Rest while we're gone, after all you are still a patient.'

'Why does everyone keep saying that?' Danny said with a small laugh as his father gave him a wink and left the room.


	16. Chapter 16

Danny walked through the doors of his apartment and felt nothing. He figured fear would shake him and cause him to break apart into a pile of useless man on the floor, but nothing happened. His parents stood behind him, waiting for a reaction as Flack entered ahead of Danny and placed his bags in the bedroom. He wish he didn't need help, but he did. He was healing and he didn't want anything to hinder that. The constant ache was now only a spontaneous pain with different movements of his body as his chest bone healed together.

The people around him shifted funny, talked quietly and looked at him as if he were made of glass. He was angry, he was tired, and he missed Lindsay. She wasn't here at his request, but he hoped just once that she would ignore him. She had a way about shutting out the bullshit and helping him relax. Taking a breath he cleared his mind, thinking about her made his already hurting heart hurt worse.

Walking slowly to his couch he stopped and looked down at the hardwood where the faint stains of his ordeal lay. Dropping his gaze down, he saw the ghost of his blood looking back at him. Flack immediately took notice and walked to where he stood and place a hand on his back.

'They did their best to clean it... some stuff just has a way of sticking with us.' He said softly, feeling Danny's tension.

'Yeah... I guess it does.' He said softly, mostly to himself, as he ran his fingers down the scar on his chest. Looking up at Flack he faked a smile and made his way to his sofa. Sitting down he instantly relaxed as he sunk into his familiar lounge.

'You should be in bed honey, I've already made it. I can make you something to eat before you go to sleep if you'd like?' His mother said in her bantering tone.

'Ma, I mean this in the nicest way. Go Home.' Danny said as he closed his eyes and listened as his mother huffed and puffed.

'Danny, I just want to make sure everything is in order before I leave. I don't want you to worry. It wouldn't hurt to have someone take care of you, you know?' She said as she stood with her hands on her hips.

'Come on Lynne, he's tired. Besides I think he's been taking care of himself fine in your absence.' Louie Sr. said as he coached her back to the front door.

'Lou, don't patronize me.' She said moving to Danny's side and kissing his cheek softly. 'I'll call you in a couple hours and make sure everything is ok.'

'No you won't Lynne.' His father said and he leaned over the back of the couch and kissed his son's head. 'Relax Dan-o, we'll call you tomorrow.' His father said as he put his coat on.

'Thanks, Dad.' He said without opening his eyes. 'How 'bout I call you, Ma?'

'Fine, fine.' She said as she too put her coat on. 'Bye baby.' She said as the door shut behind her.

'Whoa, am I ever happy I didn't grow up with an Italian mother.' Flack laughed as he took a spot beside Danny.

'Tell me about it.' Danny said as he leaned back with his hands resting loosely on his stomach.

'Dan, Lindsay told me what happened.' Flack said cautiously, as he waited for a reaction from him.

'I don't want to talk about it, Don.' Danny said quickly, changing the subject. 'You should go, I'm just going to sleep anyways. I'm a boring host.' He said as he finally opened his eyes. 'All that walking today really took it out of me.' He smiled.

'You'll be back to the old annoying Danny before you know it.' He said getting up from the couch. 'I know you're sick of hearing this but, call me if you need anything.' He said as he reached out his hand and Danny shook it.

'I'll be calling you, long before I'll be callin' Mama Messer. Trust me.' He said with a smile as he got up and follow Flack to the door.

'Oh I almost forgot. Lucas made bail; he's out, I don't know how he came up with the cash, but he's out.' Flack said with a calm look on his face.

'Huh, that's odd.' Danny replied, confusion written all over his face.

'Yeah, that's what I thought.' Flack said turning back to the door. 'Really Dan, I mean it. Anything.' He said as his hand moved to his head, looking like a phone, and he exited Danny's quiet apartment.

'See ya Don.' Danny said before the door closed behind him.

Holding his hand on the door and holding his chest with his other, he stared at the new frame around the door. The colour of the wood was new and fresh, it was different. Suddenly his apartment felt different, this strange yet familiar place felt as if the walls were closing. Moving back to the couch he sat down and pulled his cell phone out of his side bag that sat on the floor beside him. Opening the phone he hesitated over the numbers, he couldn't dial the number he had dialed a million times before. He did not know what to say once she answered, he didn't know what she would say, or if there were even words to describe the pain that flowed between them. Dropping the phone to his lap, and laid his head back on the couch. Clearing his head was interrupted by a knock at his door, sitting forward he turned his body to face the door.

'Lindsay?' He said quietly to himself as he lifted his tired body off of the couch and moved across the room to his door. Standing in front of it, he hoped she was there, taking a deep breath and moved towards the handle.

Opening the door slowly, shock hit him as a tall young man stood before him.

'Lucas?' Danny said.

'Hi Danny.' He said calmly, as he pulled the gun from his jacket and fired at Danny's chest.


	17. Chapter 17

After the hospital, Lindsay walked around Central Park for hours. She hated herself, she hated what she said to him, she hated herself for hurting him. The words hadn't come out right and had ruined the best thing that has ever happened to her. She had her fears of their relationship, but they were her own fears, not of him. Sitting on a bench beside a large fountain she wondered how he was; if he was upset, in pain, calm, happy? She didn't know, but she knew she missed him.

'This is stupid.' She said to herself as she got off the bench and walked out of the park. Knowing where she should be, she made the decision to go back, to go home to the man she loved. Something was telling her that he needed her more right now then any other time.

* * *

Danny's body fell slowly to the ground as he felt the bullet entered his shoulder, feeling the warm liquid of his blood wash over his chest as he went. 

'Ah! What are you doing?' He yelled as he began to crawl away from the door and Lucas as he entered the apartment and closed the door behind him.

'I'm finishing what I started.' He said and he walked slowly up to Danny's body as Danny dragged with all his strength across his living room, a small trail of blood followed that slowly seeped out of the new hole in his shoulder.

'What the hell did I do to piss you off this much?' He screamed as Lucas came to his side, and kicked Danny in the stomach. 'AH!' He gasped as his body curled in on itself.

'It's what you didn't do jag-off.' Lucas said calmly as he got down on one knee and grabbed Danny by the hair. Danny cringed in pain as he pulled him into a sitting position. 'You never did anything to help me. You were too busy being a super cop to give a shit about your own family.' He said close to his face as he began to push down on Danny's injured shoulder as he screamed in pain.

'What are you talking about?' Danny screamed as tears of pain clouded his vision.

'Did you really believe Tony could be smart enough to pull this off? Come on, Dan-o! I thought you were one of the smart cops!?' He said with a laugh, Danny noted the evil written over his face. This was not the kid that he grew up with.

'Why?' He said as he began to pant, air was in less and less supply as the blood left his body.

'Uncle Tony. You think he watched me because he was such a great guy? He raped me. For years... and no one said anything.' He said sadly as the colour began to disappear from Danny's face. 'Tony knew, he poisoned him when he found out. Cos he was loyal, unlike you, he cared about me.'

'I didn't know... I swear I had no idea.' Danny said softly as his eyes began to dim. The ache in his chest taking over as the new hole began to pulse with a new form of pain.

'You knew... how could you not? Why else would you leave me the money? Huh?' Lucas yelled into his face as he shook him by the collar of his sweater.

'I wanted you to go to school... I didn't want this for you. You're better then this, Luke!' Danny opened his eyes and looked up at his young cousin. Watching the dull expression he wore broke his heart, this was not the kid he grew up with.

Before Lucas could respond to the last question, he pulled the gun back and brought it down across Danny's cheek, with a sickening crack he tasted blood across his tongue. His eyes fluttered before they closed as consciousness left him leaving him in the hands of a man sick with revenge.

* * *

Lindsay entered Danny's old apartment building with hesitation but pushed herself past her own fears knowing Danny needed her. Walking up the staircase, she stopped. Noting the eery silence throughout the building, knowing it was still during working hours, it had never been this quiet. As her instincts took over, she pulled her gun from her holster, keeping it at hip level she entered Danny's floor. 

Walking down the short hallway to Danny's apartment she stopped before his door and noticed the shell casing outside Danny's door on the ground. Looking closer she saw the drops of blood close to the bottom of the door. Leaning back against the wall as cover she quiet stepped towards the door, pulling her cell phone out as she went. '_Need Backup at Danny's apartment. Shots fired, blood present._' She typed into her phone and forwarded the message to the team. Turning back to the door she braced herself and she tested the handle, it wasn't locked.

Taking a deep breath, she slowly exhaled as she kicked the door open, gun raised.


	18. Chapter 18

The door swung open as Lindsay entered, gun raised and ready. Before her she found Lucas standing behind Danny whom had his hands tied together in a chair while he stood back with a bottle of lighter fluid in his hands, jumping as Lindsay entered he pulled his gun aiming at her.

'Drop the gun, NOW!' She yelled across the apartment, as she noticed the blood running down Danny's chest.

'What the fuck! Where the hell did you come from?' Lucas said as Lindsay noticed the smell throughout the apartment, it was covered in lighter fluid.

'Don't the fucking gun, or I swear to god I'll blow you away.' Lindsay said as her eyes grew cold with hatred.

'Not before I do.' Lucas said coolly as he pulled a lighter from his pocket. Holding it by his head he attempted to light it, before the spark went off, Lindsay fired. Hitting him directly in the fingers.

'AH! You stupid bitch!' He screamed as he cradled his injured hand in his chest. Blood soaking his shirt, he held the gun steady at Lindsay. 'You're dead bitch, Dead!' He yelled as he cocked his weapon.

'I don't think so...' She said as she cocked her own gun and pulled the trigger, shooting him in the knee. Falling to his knee he dropped the gun, grabbing at his now bleeding leg. 'I'm surgical with this thing. Whose the bitch now!' Lindsay said as she grabbed the gun from the floor in front of him.

Holding the gun aimed at his face, she moved to Danny's side. Still unconscious, she reached under his neck and felt for a pulse, he was alive. Moving back to Lucas, she bent forward and whispered in his ear.

'Do you think this makes you a man, Lucas?' She said calm and coldly. 'You go after a man who has no strength. You fight him when he can't defend himself, you think your tough? Is that what this is? You're nothing.' Lindsay said with a smile as she brought the gun down across his cheek with everything she had.

'Ah!' Lucas yelled as blood covered Lindsay's gun, she hit him again. 'Stop! Stop, please!' Lucas yelled, as Lindsay hit him. Stopping herself she looked down at Lucas, he had blood coating most of his body. Realizing how fast she was breathing, she moved back and picked up her cell phone and dialed Flack, as Lucas began to cry.

'Monroe? What's going on?' Flack said as he answered.

'Lucas Messer came back to finish the job. Looks like Danny has been shot, hurry.' She was calm, it was scaring her. 'I have Lucas in custody.' She said as she closed the phone, ignoring Flack as he continued to talk to her.

Moving back to Lucas, she pushed she gun to his forehead. Lucas closed his eyes and began to whimper.

'Stop, please! I'm sorry!' He screamed with fear as Lindsay held her frame steady, fear overwhelmed her as her body did not shake.

'You're sorry? Sorry for what, sending a rapist to attack me and kill Danny? Or sorry you got caught?' Her breathing hitched as she looked into his eyes, he was afraid. 'Give me one good reason why I shouldn't pull the trigger? Give me one reason why I shouldn't coat the floor with brains? TELL ME!' She screamed as Lucas squeezed his eyes shut and begged.

'Lindsay?' She heard a weak voice calling. 'Lindsay, stop.' Danny said as he awoke from unconsciousness.

Lindsay could not move, she stood above Lucas with the gun pushed against his flesh.

'This has to end Danny!' She said as she pushed the gun and Lucas gasped.

'Not like this Linds, put the gun down.' Danny said with heavy breaths. Pain clouding his mind as he watched the events unfold in front of him. 'Please, Lindsay... not like this.' He said as he spit blood out of his mouth. 'Look at me!' He said fiercely as she stood stiff with revenge.

'I can't... I can't Danny.' She said as tears began to fall down her cheeks. 'This has to end!' She said as her hand began to shake.

'LOOK AT ME!' Danny yelled, shocking Lindsay to the core as she looked up at Danny. Without moving her aim, she looked up at Danny, as he slowly moved stood up from the chair, wincing in pain as he went.

'Give me the gun?' Danny said as he slowly walked towards her.

'No.' She said as tears flowed freely down her face.

'Lindsay, give me the gun.' He said as his hands reached to her, both tied at the wrists.

'I can't... I can't do this.' Her body shook as her aim dropped to the floor. Lucas let out a loud sob as he began to cry uncontrollably. Danny reached Lindsay and took the gun from her hands, Lindsay to began to cry.

'It's gonna be ok.' Danny said as she moved towards him and began untying his hands, once untied Lindsay hugged him, as Danny squeezed his eyes shut against the pain.

'I'm sorry, I'm sorry about everything!' Lindsay cried as she hugged him.

'Shh... it's ok.' Danny said as they separated and Lindsay looked at his gun shot wound.

'You need help, I called for back up... they should be here soon.' Lindsay said as she examined the cut on his cheek.

'It's worse then it looks.' Danny lied as his shoulder began throb with pain once again.

'Dan-' Lindsay began as movement from behind Danny caught her attention. Lucas lunged at the gun in Danny's hand knocking both Lindsay and Danny backwards.

Taking aim at Danny, Lindsay screamed out as she heard the sound of gun shots rang out throughout the apartment for the second time today.


	19. Chapter 19

The blasts of gun shots shocked Lindsay to the core as she threw her body on top of Danny and pushed him to the floor, the sound of something hitting the floor caught her attention as she heard footsteps throughout the room.

'Lindsay, Danny are you ok?' She heard a familiar voice say, looking up she found Stella standing above her.

'What happened?' Lindsay said as she moved herself off Danny as she heard him moan. 'Danny, you still with me?' She said as she reached over him and gave him a light shake.

'Where's Luke?' Danny said as he weakly pulled himself up with Lindsay's assistance.

Sitting up the gravity of the situation hit him, Flack stood over Lucas with his gun in hand. Lucas had been shot, he could see his chest rising and falling rapidly trying desperately to get air. Flack stood with a radio in hand calling for backup and an ambulance. Moving slowly and painfully across his living room to his young cousin.

'Lucas?' Danny said as he dropped to his knees beside him. Lucas' eyes shot to Danny as the look of fear washed over his young cousin.

'D-Danny!' He called as his hand reached up to him, coughing and spitting blood as Danny took Lucas' hand and intertwined his fingers in his, moving his body behind him, he lifted his head and rested it in his lap.

'Danny?' Flack said moving closer to Danny.

'Back off Flack.' Danny said as he held the young man's hand.

'I'm... so... sorry... Dan-' Lucas said as tears fell from his eyes. 'I don't... wanna... die!' Lucas said as he began to panic. 'I'm sorry...' Lucas said as his breathing began to slow.

'It's alright Luke, shhh... just breathe. It's gonna be ok.' Danny lied as he stroked his hair. 'Shhh...' He repeated as Lucas slowly faded away. As Lucas' eyes closed he looked at Danny, wanting something from him. Resting his cheek down on top of his hair, Danny squeezed his eyes letting the hidden tears fall. 'Shhh, it's going to be ok.' He repeated, not knowing who he was talking to. Ignoring the ache in his own body, Danny sat holding his now dead young cousin. Knowing he threw his life away because no one would help him.

Stella, Lindsay, and Flack stood above and watched the horrific display as Danny rocked the body back and forth. Flack took a step towards when Lindsay held out her hand, letting Danny grieve for a few more seconds couldn't hurt. Flack stopped as they exchanged looks of regret and sadness.

After a minute, Lindsay kneeled down next to him and placed a hand on his shoulder.

'Come on Danny.' She said softly as he continue to rock his baby cousin. 'It's done. Come on.' She said as she pulled him back to look at her, noticing the small amounts of blood still falling from the hole in his shoulder. Danny turned and looked up at her, tears falling over his cheeks.

'I didn't help him.' Danny said softly. 'I didn't do anything.'

'You didn't know.' She answered softly still holding her hand on his shoulder.

'I could have saved him.' He said looking back at the body, colour rapidly disappearing from his face.

The movement of feet behind him caught his attention as the room began to fill with police and paramedics, Mac as well, not too far behind.

'What happened?' He said quickly walking up to Stella and Flack. Without words, they nodded their heads towards Danny and Lucas' body. 'Oh god.' Mac said as reality kicked in. Walking over beside them, Mac's supervisor skills took over.

'Danny? We have to check the body.' He said as Danny stared straight ahead, not taking his eyes off of Lucas.

'He's gone... I felt him go a little while ago.' He said quietly.

'Danny, you need to let him go.' He said sternly, as tears continue to fall from his eyes.

'Come on Danny.' Lindsay echoed as Mac began to pull Danny away from the body carefully, as Flack came behind and helped lift him away. Mac and Flack walked Danny away from the body as paramedics checked over Lucas, confirming what they already knew. He was gone.

'You hit?' Mac said taking note of the blood, as he ran his hands over Danny's shoulder getting a feel of his injury.

'I didn't help him.' Danny repeated as he watched the paramedics take Lucas pulse and finding nothing. 'I didn't do anything...' He said as his knees began to shake.

'Whoa!' Flack said as his body shook and collapsed slowly, with Mac and Flack on either side of him, as his knees buckled and collapsed, they took a hold of him. Holding his steady until they placed him safely on the ground. 'I couldn't-' Danny said incoherently as Flack held his arm.

'It's not your fault buddy.' He cooed as he turned to the medics, 'Hey Guys, he's been shot. Wanna get over here?' Flack said as the two paramedics came and began to work on him. 'You're gonna be alright, Dan.' Flack said as the medics took over, pushing them out of the way.

'How long has he been bleeding like this?' A male paramedic asked.

'I dunno... maybe fifteen minutes?' Lindsay answered, as Danny's eyes began to drift open and close.

'Ok, he's lost a lot of blood, we're going to have to transport as quick as possible.' The other medic said as they lifted him on to the back board. 'Sir, we're gonna take good care of you.' The medics said close to Danny's face, as the team looked on hopelessly as Danny's eyes became heavier and heavier.


	20. Chapter 20

Two hours later, the team found themselves at the hospital once again. Danny had managed to stay conscious all the way to the hospital, the doctors had been with him since. Waiting along the hallways, the team did not speak. The events over the last two months had taken everything they had out of them, they were mentally exhausted and it showed.

Lindsay sat with her back against the wall on the cold floors of the hallway with her hands rested in her folded lap, as calm as she could fake, she sat staring at her hands, covered in the rich colour of blood dried on her fingers. The blood was a mixture of Danny and Lucas', the thought made her sick. What kind of monster had she become, who was that person that beat that kid, that shot him. She was no better then him. She was sick with revenge as well. She couldn't bare the thought of Danny being hurt again, it made her sick to her stomach. After everything he had gone through at her hand, he had suffered again at the hand of the man that caused this to begin with. Why? What had he done to deserve this?

Lost in her thoughts, she did not notice when a doctor came into the room and began to talk to Mac and Stella. Flack placed a hand on her shoulder, she looked up as he nodded towards the doctor. Lindsay got up and walked towards him.

'Hi, I'm Dr. Lesson. Danny's fine. It was a flesh wound, we've given him some sutures and some pain meds. Although he did loose quite a bit of blood, but we're giving him a transfusion and once his volume is back up there is no reason why he can't go home relatively soon.' He said directly to the team.

'Oh thank god.' Stella said letting out a deep breath.

'Can we see him?' Lindsay asked.

'Yes, he's resting right now. He's in exam C.' He said as Mac shook his hand.

'Thank you Doctor.' Mac said, Dr. Lesson gave a nod and he turned to leave.

Turning back to the team, Mac addressed them. 'Finally some good news. Lindsay why don't you go see him?' He said as Lindsay nodded and passed him. 'Oh and Lindsay, you might want to wash your hands first.' He said looking at her blood encrusted fingers.

'Right... yeah.' She said as she paused and looked at her palms.

Walking through the halls, she stopped at an exam room and found a sink. Turning on the hot water she stuck her hands under the running liquid, as the blood loosened from the surface she took soup and began to scrub her sick. The blood acted like glue, stuck between the lines of her skin, it sunk in. The harder she scrubbed the more her skin hurt. The water was hot and it burned, loosing her ability to think, her head dropped towards the sink as tears began to fall freely from her eyes.

'What have I become?' She said out loud hoping for an answer. When none came she dried her hands and her tears, straightened herself out and walked from the room.

Danny's room was cold, or at least to her it felt cold. She imagined her breath freezing as it left her mouth, she deserved the cold, she had become frozen on the inside. Numb to her surroundings, she felt weak standing in his presence.

He lay in his hospital bed, once again with I.V.'s entering his wrists once again, pumping the missing blood into his body. His eyes were closed, but he was awake. Not knowing how to react to his current situation, his paranoia not to far off and his fear very present. Hearing the sounds of feet on the floor he slowly opened his eyes and found Lindsay standing back playing with her hands.

'Hi.' She said weakly. Shame brightening her face.

'Hi.' He responded.

'Danny, I-' She began before he cut her off.

'Can we not?' He said calmly.

'What?' She said bringing a hand to her chest.

'No more... I don't want to talk. Can we just, not?' He said sternly.

'Ok.' She said as tears came to her eyes and she turned away to leave.

'Lindsay?' He said softly, as she turned back to him.

'Stay?' He said as he reached his hand out to her, tears fell from her face as she walked toward his hand and wrapped her fingers around his. Bringing the hand to her face she kissed his fingers as she began to cry.

'Come 'ere.' He said pulling her into the bed, as she rested her head against his uninjured shoulder, and cried.

'It's alright. Shh, it's ok.' He said softly to her as he rubbed her back with his arm, kissing the top of her head while she cried. 'It's going to be alright.' He said as he squeezed his eyes shut as tears formed in his own eyes.


	21. Chapter 21

The next day Danny was being released from the hospital, dosed in pain medication and his arm in a sling, he was ready for home. Lindsay entered his room as Danny attempted to pull a shirt over his wounded shoulder, wincing in pain his face replicated the ache in his body.

'Hey, what are you doing?' Lindsay said as she moved to help him dress.

'It's a lot harder then I thought it would be.' Danny said as he gave up and let Lindsay finish the task. She gently moved the shirt around his bandaging as he replaced the sling around his arm.

'How ya doing?' She asked as he sat back on the bed, leaning down to put socks on all while gasping out in pain, as Lindsay put out a hand to stop him and took the socks from his hand.

'I can do that!' he said defensively.

'I'm sure you can super man, but the look on your face says you hate doing it. Just let me help you, ok?' Lindsay said as she leaned down and put his socks and shoes on. 'How are you feeling? Alright?' Lindsay said noticing the colour had yet to come back to his face.

'I'm sick of hospitals. I feel like crap, but I don't want to be here anymore.' Danny was angry, and frustrated and it showed.

'Alright, then let's get you out of here. Just relax alright?' Lindsay said as she finished tying his shoes.

'It's not just that...' He paused and drew in a deep breath and closed his eyes. 'I don't want to go home.' He said sadly. 'I never thought I'd say this Linds, but I'm afraid. It's not my home anymore.' He said looking at his hands.

'I can understand.' She said as she looked up at Danny and took a seat next to him on the bed. 'That's why I went to your apartment this morning and Flack and I moved most of your stuff to my apartment.' She smiled.

'You what?' Danny said looking up at her.

'I think you need someone to take care of you... just for awhile, and if after that you don't want a roommate... then we'll move you where ever you want to go. But I agree with your mother, for once, that you need someone to take care of you.' She tried to be happy, he seemed empty and she was taking it upon herself to cheer him up.

'I thought you weren't ready?' He said cautiously with a kink in his brow.

'Danny, this isn't about me. This is what you need. And besides, I'm kind of looking forward to having a roommate.' She smiled at him. In her surprise, he looked at the floor. 'What?'

'If I didn't get shot yesterday would we be having this conversation?' He said in a tone that told her he wasn't happy.

'Danny-' She started.

'No, really... tell me the truth?' He asked looking up at her.

'The truth?' She said looking over his face. 'Why do you think I came back yesterday?'

'What?'

'Why do you think I came back?' She paused and waited for a reply, when there wasn't one she continued. 'I came back for you. You, Danny. What did you think I have Spidey senses?' She said taking his hand in hers. 'I realized how stupid I was being for throwing this away. For pushing you away.'

'I thought you said-' Danny started, but this time Lindsay cut him off.

'I'm sorry I said I didn't trust you. I do, but I don't trust myself. I'm sorry I hurt you, and I'm sorry I wasn't there for you.' She said looking him in the eye, she wanted to make sure he heard her.

After a minute of silence, Danny broke their gaze and looked away, wiping a tear from his eye.

'What a shitty couple of months.' Danny said with a laugh.

'You're tellin' me.' Lindsay said squeezing his hand. 'Danny, I want it all with you; I wanna live with you, I want a baby with you, I want to marry you.' She said happily as he turned back to her. 'I love you.'

Without answering, he pulled her in with his working arm and kissed her. It wasn't overly passionate, it wasn't aggressive, but it was exactly what they needed. After a second they heard someone clearing their throat, looking up they found Mac, Stella and a nurse with a wheel chair standing in the door.

'Sorry.' Lindsay said sheepishly as she stood up, not letting go of his hand.

'Sorry to interrupt, but your ride awaits Mr. Messer.' Stella said, walking to Danny's side bag and lifting it up as the nurse wheeled the chair to where Danny sat.

'Oh, good... yeah...' Danny said looking at the chair. Slowly getting off the bed he winced in pain as he stepped into the chair.

'You ready?' Lindsay said standing next to him.

'I don't know, but I have had enough of hospitals to last a life time... let's go.' He hesitated as he settled himself into the chair. 'Mac, can I talk to you? Alone, it'll just take a minute.' Danny asked as he readjusted his sling.

'Yeah, no problem.' Mac answered answered as the nurse, Lindsay and Stella left the room, closing the door behind themselves. 'What's up?' Mac asked once the room was clear and he took a chair next to Danny.

'What do you know about Lucas?' He asked sheepishly.

'Danny-'

'No, I want to know Mac. I want to know what happened to him.' He said before Mac could finish.

'You don't want to know, Danny. You might think it will be easier, but it won't. He had issues, you couldn't have seen, he wasn't in the right state of mind.' Mac said in a soft tone, hoping to calm his mind.

'I don't understand it. I just can't wrap my head around, it doesn't make any sense.' He said looking down at his hands.

'Some times it's easier if we don't understand why people do what they do.' Mac said as Danny looked up at him with intensity.

'Don't talk to me like a victim! I'm sick of being treated like one!' Danny said, his voice full of resentment.

'I didn't mean it like that. You are a good cop, and you want to find reasoning, but this is not the average case Danny. You almost died, you were put through hell. Give yourself time to heal and stop trying to make sense of all of this.' Mac said putting a comforting hand on his shoulder. 'You don't have to understand what caused this, understanding will only make it worse.' Staring straight into Mac's eyes, Danny knew he was right.

'I just wish I could have done something.' Danny said sadly.

'I know, I'm sorry.' Mac said as he squeezed his shoulder. 'Why don't we get out of her before your mother finds us?' Mac said with a smile as Danny laughed.

'You've experienced Momma Messer too?' Danny smiled.

'Oh... quite a bit. Now, let's get out of here.' Mac smiled as he stood up and began wheeling Danny from the room.

'Home... take me home.' Danny said as the door opened and he left the hospital, hopefully, for the last time.


	22. Chapter 22

Taking a deep breath Danny pulled the door open of the large New York sky scraper as he entered the lab for the first time in four and a half months. Catching the air in his throat he closed his eyes and relaxed his body. '_You can do this._' He said to himself as he entered the elevator and pressed the button he had pressed hundreds of times before, fear causing his body to stiffen. Leaning back against the empty elevator he looked down at his hands, they were shaking, he had been cleared to come back to work and leaving his and Lindsay's apartment this morning he believed he was ready. That was until he opened the door, a door to a world he almost lost entirely.

Hearing the doors of the elevator open he saw the familiar hallways of the crime lab, breathing out, he stepped out of the elevator. The hallways were busy, as they always were, as he passed labs and offices until he reached the locker room. Pushing the door open it creaked as he entered, letting it slowly close behind him, he looked around and found himself alone again.

Taking in the familiar sounds and smells of the room he walked softly to his locker and spun the dial on the lock. Forgetting the numbers, he rested his thumb on the dial as the door opened behind him.

'Hey Man, I thought I saw you come in!' Hawkes said walking up behind him and giving him a friendly slap on the shoulder.

'Yeah... It's ah... it's my first day back.' Danny said still trying to open his lock.

'Already? Well welcome back Mess, we missed ya.' He said as he went to his own locker and began to open it. 'You alright?' Hawkes said noticing his hesitance.

'Yeah, no I'm fine... I just forgot the combo.' He said finally looking up at Hawkes. His face was contorted with concern.

'You sure you're ok?' Hawkes said putting his things down and walking to Danny, noticing the sad look he wore across his face.

'Yeah.' Danny said with a force smile and a nod looking back down as his breathing increased. Dropping the lock he sat down on the bench behind him. 'I don't know why I can't remember. I've had the same lock for five years.' He shook his head in confusion.

Without a word, Hawkes sat down on the bench next to him, placing a hand on his shoulder.

'It'll come to you man.' He said coolly as Danny looked up at him.

'Yeah.' Danny said as he cleared his throat and stood up. 'So, anything crazy happen since I left?' He asked with a smile, changing the subject.

'Ah... you know, the usual 7 hours of pure boredom, mixed with 1 hour of pure terror. Same ol'.' Hawkes laughed as Danny smiled.

'I miss it.' Danny said dropping his bag to the floor.

'How could ya not?' Hawkes laughed as he put his arm around his friend's shoulder as they left the room.

* * *

Lindsay sat at her desk catching up on paper work when she saw Mac walk past her door. 

'Mac!' She yelled as she jumped to her feet and caught up with him.

'What's up, Lindsay?' He said as he turned to the sound of his name.

'Can I talk to you for a second?' Lindsay as as Mac nodded as they returned to her office. Closing the door behind him she walked around to her desk. 'I know that Danny has been cleared for duty, but I'm worried about him. He said he's coming back in two weeks but-'

'No, he's here.' Mac said in confusion.

'He's what?' Lindsay's face dropped.

'He's back today, he's already reported to me.' Mac said in his supervisor tone.

'He lied to me.' Lindsay said as she turned and left the office, leaving Mac standing in confusion.

Walking through the hallways of the lab looking through the glass of each lab for the man she loved and was ready to kill. Walking past the DNA lab, she spotted Hawkes, Flack, Adam, and Danny laughing as Danny and Flack compared their scares. Danny of course winning, as she entered the room.

'Lindsay!' Danny said happily as she entered, his happiness slowly fading seeing the angry look on her face.

'Can I talk to you, please?' She said, adding 'please' only as a gesture, knowing he didn't have a choice.

'Um, yeah... I'll catch up with you in a bit.' Danny said to his friends as he left the lab with Lindsay.

Once outside, Lindsay walked in a fast pace down the hall to their shared office, once they were inside, Danny took a seat at his desk, preparing himself for a fight.

'Well?' Lindsay asked leaning her back against the door.

'Well what?' Danny said in confusion.

'Really? You have to ask?' Lindsay said through clenched teeth.

'What exactly are we talking about?' Danny said leaning forward, ignoring the ache in his chest as he did so. He was always in pain, he just got used to it.

'You lied to me.' She folded her arms across her chest. 'You said you weren't going to rush coming back, and from what I can see, you're jumping the gun by two weeks.' Her breathing was speeding up, she was angry.

'Lindsay, I can't just sit at home. I'm ready.' He lied.

'Do you know why they give you time off after you've been shot? So you can heal!' Lindsay said loudly.

'I'm fine! I'm healed, alright? I didn't lie to you, I just didn't tell you I was coming back early.' He said trying to relax his heart.

'Oh, sure! That's not lying at all! How could you not tell me? I have to find out from Mac?' Her cheeks began to change colour as her anger level rose.

'Sorry, I didn't realize that I needed your permission! My mistake.' Danny said as he got up to leave, but Lindsay blocked him in the process. 'Move, I'm going back to work.' He said sternly, without looking at her.

'No, we're going to talk about this. You aren't ready.' Lindsay said putting a hand against his chest.

'No Lindsay, you're going to talk at me... Move!' He said angrily as he passed her pushing his way out of the office. Once he was passed the door way he stopped and turned back to Lindsay who was still standing in the same position, not facing him. Without anything to say, he continued down the hallway, holding a hand on his chest as it began to ache beyond reason.

Walking in to the locker room, he began to pant as his chest felt as if it was being ripped apart. With shaking hands he found his bag by his locker, opening it up he found his pain medication and took two pills dry. Sitting against the lockers he breathed until his chest stopped burning and his vision cleared. Relaxing was difficult when it hurt to breath, he thought he was past the pain. His left hand became tingly as he released his fist, closing his eyes and leaning his head against the locker he took a deep breath as the pills began to kick in. His eyes glossed over, his heart slowed, and his pain became a soft pulse in his chest.

After a minute he stood up, unstable on his feet at first, he walked to the sink. Resting his palms on the edge, he turned the water on and began splashing water on his face.

'Hey.' He heard from behind as he turned around quickly to find Flack standing in the door.

'Hi.' He said shyly as he picked up paper towel and began to dry his face.

'You alright?' Flack said stepping into the room slowly.

Taking a deep breath into the towels on his face, removing the towels he looked back to Flack.

'Yeah. Lindsay is just being... ya know.' He said shaking from stress, trying to find the fact that his meds were making his head spin.

'Are you sure your ready?' Flack asked, as Danny looked up at him.

'Not you too, come on man! You of all people should understand.' Danny said as frustration took over.

'Whoa, understand what?' Flack said holding his hands out in surrender.

'Everything... coming back to this job, after... the accident. I'm sick of people walking on egg shells, acting like they care, pretending to be supportive. When all you're doing is standing waiting for me to fall apart!' Danny said using his hands to emphasize his anger.

'First off, it wasn't an accident. So stop calling it one. Second of all, we are supportive of you, but if you're coming back early to prove you're still 'the man' then you should turn your ass around.' Flack said walking close to Danny, making sure his point is made.

Danny rolled his eyes and pushed past Flack to leave the locker room when Flack took hold of his arm. 'Don't think for a second that I don't have your back. I'm on your side.' He said making sure Danny looked him in the eyes.

'Then have it and stop acting like I'm about to collapse.' Danny said as he jerked his arm out of his reached and walked out of the room. Walking down the hall his phone began to beep. Looking down he found a message from Mac, his first crime scene.


	23. Chapter 23

The crime scene was in an old apartment building in the upper west side, the hallways smelled of moist bread and rotting food, the smell caused his stomach to roll. Walking into the small apartment he saw the body the man was covered in blood, hands tied at the wrists, face down on an old carpet. The thick smell of blood and rotting flesh hit him as his body froze. Thinking only of his own gun shot wound, his chest began to tingle as the flash of the gun and Lucas' face entered his mind. Shaking off the hard images he walked slowly up to Stella, who stood over the body taking photos.

'I guess we can rule out suicide.' Danny said looking at the ropes tied around the victims wrists.

Stella jumped at the sudden presence and turned around, smiling she gave Danny a quick hug.

'What are you doing back?' She asked happily.

'I was cleared for duty, so here I am!' Danny said sarcastically, Stella smiled as Danny continued. 'Enough about me, any ideas here?' Danny said motioning back to the body, trying to hide his shaking hands.

'Yeah, looks like a robbery. Place looks like it's been flipped. From the area and the look of this place, I'd say it's about drugs or guns.' Stella said as she got down closer to the body.

'Alright, I'm going to do start overalls.' Danny said walking back to his kit, as Lindsay walked into the room. Ignoring her completely, she walked past him to Stella and began talking out the scene as Danny went through his kit.

'Lindsay why don't you start on the bedroom, I have Danny taking overalls, and I'm going to stick with the body. Good?' Stella said as Lindsay smiled and took her kit back to the other room.

Turning her attention to Danny, she noticed his face fall as she left the room without acknowledging him. 'You guys alright?' Stella asked quietly.

'What?' Danny said looking up from his camera.

'You and Lindsay? You seemed kinda... well, cold.' Stella said with a kink of curiosity.

'Fine. We're fine.' He said as he ignored her concern and went back to work.

'Sorry... I'll mind my business.' She said holding her hands back in a surrendering motion.

'Yeah you do that.' Danny said harshly, then realized how rude he had been. 'I'm sorry Stel, I didn't mean-' He attempted to explain.

'It's ok...' She said with a smile, making note of the stress lines under his eyes. 'Let's get back to work.' She smiled as he continued taking photos.

Lindsay entered the room again and began to explain her findings. 'I have evidence of sexual activity in here, consistent with rape. There is blood on the sheets.' She said noticing as Danny covered his chest with his arm, as if in pain. Knowing saying anything would lead to a fight, she turned back to Stella. 'I have my trace, I'm going to head back to the lab. Call me if you find anything?' She said as Stella gave her a nod and she left the room.

Danny's chest began to pulse with pain once again as he held a hand over his heart, breathing hitched as he closed his kit.

'Dan? Something wrong?' Stella said walking towards him.

'I'll um... I just need some air... I guess I forgot about the smell... I'll be right back.' He said as he sped his pace and left the room.

The hallway wasn't any better as the walls began to close in around him; seeing an exit he walked fast, upon entering an alley way he felt the bile rise in his throat as he grabbed a wall and began to empty his stomach. When his stomach was clear, he sat down on some steps; with shaking hands he reached into his pocket and pulled out his bottle of pain medication once again, and took two more pills dry. Squeezing his eyes shut, he brought his hands to his forehead and rested his elbows on his knees.

Fighting off tears, he shook his head. 'You can do this, it'll come back to you.' He said to himself as he traced his finger tips around his temples. Caught in a daze he heard someone from behind clearing their throat, turning he found Stella staring at him from the doorway.

'I'm fine.' He answered before she could ask.

'I can see that.' She said rolling her eyes as she took a seat next to him on the steps. 'Why'd you come back two weeks early?' She asked as she placed a hand between his shoulder blades.

Finally realizing he couldn't lie to her he decided to come clean. 'I don't know.' Danny said dropping his hands out in front of him and staring straight ahead. 'On the way to the lab, I was positive that I was ready... ya know?' He said looking up at her. 'But the second I saw that body, I saw the gun. I saw my blood. I saw Luke.' He said looking down at his lap.

'Danny, if you're not ready for this take some time.' She said as she rubbed circles on his shoulder.

'I can't, I can't take any more time. I'm already forgetting things I shouldn't. If I don't come back I'm going to loose it all.' His voice had a tone of panic.

'What do you mean, loose what?' Stella asked softly.

'Me. I'm going to loose who I was.' He said looking up at Stella. Tears threatened to fall as he looked at his friend and co-worker. Taking a deep breath, Stella's heart broke.

'You know what the hardest part of my attack was?' She asked, Danny looked at her and shook his head.

'Loosing my security. I felt vulnerable everywhere I went, I couldn't sleep for weeks. All I wanted to do was close my eyes and not have Frankie's face be there. But you know what helped me through it?' She said hoping Danny would listen completely. 'Holding on.'

'What?' Danny said in confusion.

'I held on to who I was before it happened. I held on to the fact that I survived, I won. It makes you immortal, knowing you've been through hell and you still managed to come out on top.' Stella said as Danny smiled, finally.

'And what if I can't?' Danny asked as his smile faded.

'Then we'll hold on for you.' She smiled.

Danny looked down and nodded, as Stella pulled him in to a hug, once they separated Stella held onto his shoulders.

'Now, stop being pissed off with Lindsay, she's trying to help you.' She said in a hard tone with a smile.

'Thanks, Stella.' He said looking back as his hands, as he moved his hand up and wiped a tear from his face.

'Don't mention it.' She said as she got up from the steps. 'Why don't you go back to the lab and run the trace I collected... while you're there, talk to Lindsay.' She said with a smile. As she walked back into the building tapping Danny's shoulder as she went.

'Yeah... yeah I will.' He replied as he sat on the steps a little longer before getting up slowly. Standing on his feet, dizziness swept over him as he staggered on his feet. Gripping the wall he steadied himself before walking into the building as his head spun, tingling sensations gripped his skin as he entered the building once again.


	24. Chapter 24

Lindsay sat in the lab with her back to the hallway, working on trace evidence from this mornings crime scene, quietly writing on a note pad, she didn't notice the presence at the door as Danny leaned on the door frame with his arms folded at his chest watching her. He loved her more then she could understand, over the last couple of months, she had been the only thing keeping him going. Treating her the way he did earlier was hurting him more then her, he felt guilty and it was eating at him.

Moving from his position he walked closer to Lindsay and wrapped his arms around her waist and rested his chin on her shoulder squeezing her close. Letting go of her pen, she was caught in surprise.

'Danny? What are you doing?' She said as she rested her hands on top of his over her stomach, leaning her head against the side of his head.

'I'm sorry I was a dick to you.' He said softly, not letting her go.

'You should be.' She said as she picked up her pen and attempted to start work again.

'I'm serious.' He said loosening his grip on her.

'So am I.' She said as she turned on her stool to face him, wrapping her arms around his neck. 'You gotta stop trying to be tough. If you are in pain, you can't just work through it Dan. It's going to get worse.'

'I'm not.' He said as he gave her a gentle kiss on his forehead.

'Once again, lying.' She said as she pulled away from him.

'What?' Danny asked in confusion as she stood up and walked around the table, putting distance between them.

'I saw you at the scene this morning, you were grabbing at your chest. You were in pain.'

'No... it wasn't that...' He attempted to explain as Lindsay cut him off.

'Where are you pain meds?' She asked placing her hands on her hips.

'My what?' Danny said defensively as he folded his arms across his chest.

'Don't play dumb. Where are your pills?' Anger rising in her voice.

'Why?' Danny snapped.

'I want to count them.' She said authoritively.

'Excuse me? So what, am I an addict now?' Danny said as his heart rate began to increase.

'I didn't say that. If you're not in pain then your 'script should be full right? Let me count them.' She said as she put her hand out to take them.

'Go to hell!' He said angrily as he turned and left them room.

'Danny!' Lindsay said as she followed him from the room. Danny ignored her as he walked down the hall towards his office. 'Danny! Would you stop?' She yelled after him as she chased him. Changing her walk to a jog she caught up with him and ran in front of him.

Putting a hand out on his chest, he stopped.

'Would you talk to me, please?' Lindsay practically begged.

'I have nothing to say to you.' Danny said without looking at her as he pushed past her and entered his office.

'Danny-' She said again.

'No, Lindsay, stop it. If you don't have my back on this, I have nothing to say to you. Stop treating me like I am a fucking kid! Danny yelled as he turned back from the door of his office.

'Then stop acting like one!' Lindsay yelled back as Danny slammed the door. Lindsay stood in the hallway huffing and puffing as anger took over her body, looking around she found half the lab staring at her.

'Can I help you with something?' She yelled out as she turned around and walked quickly down the hallway back to the trace lab, they weren't anywhere near finished, and he knew it.


	25. Chapter 25

Danny paced back and forth across the floor of his office, anger beat through his body with the painful beat of his heart. Feeling his heart breaking, his hand went to his chest, he was hurting. Both physically and emotionally, he needed Lindsay to believe he was better, he needed her. Pain pulsed through his hand and chest as he reached into his pocket with shaking hands and pulled pills from his bottle once again. Opening the lid he slipped and dropped the bottle, sending little white pills cascading across the polish floors of his dark office.

'Fuck!' He yelled as he got down on his knees and began to pick them up one by one. Grabbing pill after pill he could feel the tears coming to his eyes; taking deep breaths to steady his shaking hands he took two pills to his tongue and swallowed them. Gagging the pills down, his hands slowed as he sat back on the floor and brought his knees around the front of himself. Leaning back against the desk he sat taking deep breaths as tears came to his eyes.

'I can't do this by myself.' He said to himself as a tear fell from his eye. Squeezing his eyes shut he willed himself to stop; to stop feeling, to stop the pain, to stop everything. Sitting for a couple more minutes, he slowly opened his eyes and finished picking up his pills with steady hands. Replacing the lid on the bottle he stood up, slowly as he straightened while the room spun around him as his phone beeped with a message from Mac.

'Whoa... easy cowboy.' He said as he laughed to himself. Feeling completely numb, he stumbled, and laughed. His head rested lightly on his shoulders as he left the office, floating down the hallway he found Mac sitting in his office. Walking up to the door he entered.

'Mac, what's going on?' He asked lightly as he leaned against the door frame.

'Close the door Danny.' Mac said as he moved papers around his desk.

'Oh... must be serious!' Danny said sarcastically as he entered the room with a smile

'Yeah, it is. Sit down.' Mac said as he pointed to a chair across from his desk. As Danny sat Mac stood up and walked around the front of his desk. 'When you told me you were ready to be back, I trusted you. When you said that I wouldn't have any trouble from you today, once again I trusted you. Now what am I supposed to think Danny?' Mac said with anger across his face.

'I don't know what you're talking about Mac?' Danny said as his vision and Mac's head began to blur.

'Lindsay doesn't think you're ready, and you two have been arguing like school children all over my lab. Tell me what's going on. Now.' Mac said as his arms folded across his chest.

Danny took a second to concentrate on his surroundings, his head spun, his vision began to slow, his mouth was dry and his hands were clamy. He was high.

'Mac... I know what you're thinking, but I'm telling you everything is fine. Lindsay and I... we had an argument yes, but it's nothing we can't handle. Would a doctor give me an OK if I wasn't? Trust me Mac!' He said holding his hands up as if in surrender.

'Are you on pain medication?' Mac asked directly.

'When I need it.' Danny answered calmly.

'Like now?' Mac said as his eye brow raised.

'I'm on a low dose, it won't effect my job.' Danny answered as he swallowed trying to loosen up the dryness in his throat.

'You and Lindsay talk about your issues on your own time. I don't need the drama.' Mac said coolly as Danny stood up to leave the office. 'And Danny...' He said as Danny opened the door. 'If you can't handle it, it's better if you deal with it before I have to.' He said seriously as Danny gave him a light nod and left.


	26. Chapter 26

'Lindsay, what do we have?' Stella asked as she entered the trace lab.

'Ah... trace from the bed comes back as personal lubricate.' She said with a sigh. 'At least they were considerate when they raped him.' She said turning her attention back to Stella.

'Ok, so maybe this was a home invasion turned sex crime?' Stella said as she put down the evidence in her hands.

'What was taken from the apartment?' Lindsay said as the two women began to go over the case.

'It's hard to tell, they place was trashed.' Stella pulled photographs out of an envelope and placed them on the table.

'What if it wasn't a home invasion? What if the person, or people, that did this were there to kill and torture this guy. Maybe they messed the place up to look like a robbery.' Lindsay said looking over the photos.

'I think you're right. Any DNA from the rape kit?' Stella asked.

'No, looks like they used a condom with the lube. We should start looking into his enemies.' Lindsay said as she stood up and took off her gloves.

'Good idea. Oh and Lindsay?' Stella said reaching out and stopping her from leaving by taking her elbow in her hand.

'Yeah?' Lindsay turned back to Stella.

'What's going on with Danny?' Lindsay sat back down onto her chair.

'I don't know. I've never seen him this snappy. He says he isn't in pain and I know he is.' Lindsay took a deep breath and looked at her lap. 'Yesterday morning we were in the shower and I wrapped my arms around his chest and he flinched, I could feel him pulling away from me. He was hurting.' Lindsay looked up at Stella with tears in his eyes.

'He just adjusting, he's been through a lot Linds.' Stella said as she rubbed her shoulders in a comforting gesture.

'No, it's different. Something is wrong.' She said as she wiped the tears from her cheeks.

'Just give him some time, alright?' Stella said as she stood up and pulled Lindsay into a hug. 'Now, let's go talk to the people Mark Maglieri knew, and put these sick bastards away for a long time.' She said tapping Lindsay on the back as she left the lab, leaving Lindsay sitting by herself.

* * *

Stella walked down the hall with her thoughts lost in the case, going over possible motives and enemies, passing the DNA lab she found Danny sitting in darkness next to a table. Sitting with his arms folded over his chest staring at the table in front of him Stella quietly entered the lab behind him. Walking up slowly behind his she placed a hand on his shoulder causing him to jump. 

'Whoa, sorry!' Stella said as Danny whipped around to face her.

'Stella, what are you doing?' He said as he tried to catch his breath.

'I should ask you the same. What are you doing in here?' She asked looking at the empty table before him.

'What? Oh... I just needed somewhere quiet to think.' He said looking away from her. 'Anything on the trace?' Danny asked as he cleared his throat.

Stella stared at him, noticing the difference when she looked him in the eyes. 'Yeah, Lindsay found traces of personal lubricate in the bedroom.'

'Well at least they were considerate when they raped him.' Danny said as Stella smiled at how much a like he and Lindsay were.

'What?' Danny asked confused by her smile.

'No, nothing. You didn't find any traces of DNA from the victim?' Stella asked as she consulted her file in front of her.

'Still waiting on DNA from his finger nails. The guy fought back, Sid says he had boxer's fracture. Half is hand was mangled.' Danny said showing Stella what bones on his hand were broken.

'Good, so we're looking for someone with a possible black eye.' Stella said pulling out a photo of the victim's hand. Dropping a photo of the victim's face, Danny bent down to pick it up, hissing in pain he held his arm over his rib cage as he stood up with the photo in his hand. Suddenly he stopped and stared at the photo, pain across his face he stared at the bloody face of Mark Maglieri.

'Danny?' Stella said as she attempted to pull his attention back to her. 'Danny!' She said louder.

Danny looked up from the photo to Stella. 'Hum?' He answered as the colour left his face.

'What's going on with you?' She asked.

'Nothing, I just... thought I saw something... it was nothing.' He lied, the truth was, when he saw the victim's bloody face he saw his own face staring back at him. Fear rolled through his stomach as his mind played games with him.

'Alright, well I'm heading back to trace. You sure you're ok?' She asked again watching the colour slowly return.

'Yeah, fine. I'm going to head back to the crime scene actually... I think we might have missed something.' Danny said straightening himself out.

'Ok, keep me informed.' She said as she turned to leave the room. Leaving the door way she turned back remembering something else. Entering the room, she saw Danny taking a pill from a bottle and swallowing it dry, forgetting what she was doing she turned around and left Danny alone. Taking her cell phone from her waist line, she phoned the one person she knew would get through to Danny.

'Flack.' He answered on the second ring.

'Hey Flack, it's Stella. I need your help.' She said as she walked quickly to her office and closed the door behind herself.


	27. Chapter 27

Going over trace evidence in his office, Danny sat with his head rested on his hand as he shifted through papers, trying to make sense of the crime. Feeling agitated he reached into his pocket taking one more pill, instantly relaxing as it made it's way to his stomach he squeezed his eyes shut.

'Long day.' He heard from the door way. Looking up he found Flack walking into the room taking his place in the chair across from him.

'Yeah, what are you still doing here?' Danny asked as he looked to the clock on his computer screen, that read _1:37 am_.

'Me? I'm here looking for you, my question is why am I looking for you at the crime lab in the middle of the night?' Flack asked as he leaned back in the chair.

'I'm just trying to finish up this paper work, this case is confusing.' Danny said as he continued to go through his case file.

'Dan, why don't you go home and get some rest. Look at it in the morning with some fresh eyes, huh?' He said hoping to get through to him.

'Nah, I'm good-' Danny said as a yawn took over his mouth.

'Yeah I can see that.' Sarcasm breathed off of Flack.

'It's not just the case.' Danny put his papers down and took his glasses off and began to rub the bridge of his nose. 'Lindsay and I... we kind of had a fight, I'm not interested in going home right now.'

'I know. That's why I'm here.' Flack said plainly as Danny looked up from his hands.

'What do you mean?' He was confused.

'Stella called me earlier and said you were poppin' pills, and had a screaming match with Linds in the middle of the trace lab. That's not like you Dan.' His face showed no sign of anger or frustration, he just cared.

'I know.' Danny said with shame as he looked at the desk.

'What are you fighting about? And don't say nothin'.' Flack sat up in his chair and leaned towards Danny.

Taking a deep breath Danny looked up at his friend. 'Okay, it wasn't nothing. I... I lied to her. It wasn't my intention, it just sorta happened.' Danny felt guilty. Guilt for hurting Lindsay, guilt for lying to her and guilt for pretending to be fine when he was anything but.

'About what?' Flack was listening, and being there for him, with no judgment which is what he needed now.

'She's been breathing down my neck since I left the hospital and I just can't handle her right now. I just want to do my job, no questions asked, but from the second I walked through those doors this morning everything I do or say is second guessed. Then she starts accusing me of being a junkie, I lost it.' Danny sat back and folded his arms across his chest.

'Are you takin' pain meds?' Flack asked as calmly as he could so he didn't upset him more then he needed to be.

'Yes, I am but not more then I need.' He said defensively.

'How much is that?' Flack asked cautiously.

'Enough, I'm not an addict!' Danny said angrily.

'I'm not saying you are, I just want to know what you're taking.'

'It's none of your business, alright Don! Get off my back!' Danny said as he got up from the desk and turned to look out the window.

'Alright, alright!' Flack said getting up from his seat and walking to the door. 'You gotta stop and have a look at yourself Dan. This isn't you. Go home to Lindsay and figure this out. Fix it' He said before leaving the room and leaving Danny staring out the window.

* * *

Lindsay woke up with the sound of her alarm clock buzzing violently in her ear. With audible moan she stretched her body as she hit the clock with her fist, only to find herself alone in bed. With her arm she reached to Danny's pillow only to find it cold and empty. Sitting up in bed she noticed his clothes from the day before thrown on top of the hamper, knowing he had been home she pulled the covers off herself and got out of bed. Walking into the living room she found Danny laying soundlessly asleep on the couch. Laying on his side with a quilt covering his body she walked up to him slowly. Wiping the hair back from his face she noticed a pill bottle sitting on the floor beside the bed. 

Taking the bottle in her hand she lifted the lid and dropped the rest of the pills on to her hand and counted the white vicodin tablets. Ten pills were left in the bottle. Turning the label over she shook her head as movement from the couch brought her attention back to her sleeping boyfriend.

'Danny?' She said as she leaned down and began to shake him gently.

'What?' He answered without opening his eyes.

'Dan, we have to talk. Why don't you come to bed?' She asked gently as she stroked the hair from his face.

'There is nothing to talk about Lindsay. I have to work in a couple hours, I need sleep.' He had still not opened his eyes.

'I'm sure Mac will understand. Get off the couch, come on.' Lindsay shook him again, this time Danny opened his eyes.

'I don't want to fight.' He said as he stretched his hands over his head.

'Neither do I.' She said calmly with a smile, hoping he'd follow her back to their bedroom. Danny looked up at her sad brown eyes and realized what he had been doing to her.

'I'm sorry.' He said sadly not moving from his position on the couch.

'Come to bed.' She said again as she stood up and held her hand out to him. Hesitating he took her small hand in hers and stood up following her to the bedroom.

Crawling into bed, Danny wrapped his arms around Lindsay's small frame, pulling her closer to him.

'I didn't mean to push you away. I was just scared.' He said quietly to her ear from behind. 'I won't lie to you again.'

'You mean that?' Lindsay asked as she wrapped her fingers around his hands.

'Yes. I promise.' He said as he closed his eyes.

'Then tell me why you only have ten pills left of a prescription of twenty-five that was filled only two days ago?' She was blunt, but it got her point across. Tightening her grip on his hands as he attempted to pull away. 'No, stay. Talk to me.' She said as she turned in bed to face him, now laying face to face, she saw that he could no longer look her in the eyes.

'I thought I could control the pain, I couldn't. It got to be too much. I didn't take them all... I dropped the bottle and lost some.' He said finally looking up at her.

'I said not to lie to me.' She said with disappointment in her tone.

'I'm not. I swear. After our fight yesterday I got frustrated and dropped the bottle. I haven't taken all fifteen tabs, come on Linds! I'd be dead!'

'Or really high.' She said bluntly as she sat up in bed and leaned against the back board. 'If you have a problem, tell me. We can fix it Danny.' She said as she looked at her hands in her lap.

'Lindsay it's not like that.' He explained as he sat up in bed and took her hand. 'I can handle it, I just needed to get through the day. I'm fine. Ok?' He said looking at her in the eyes. She didn't believe him.

'I can deal with a lot Danny, I can. But I can't deal with you being a junkie.' Lindsay said looking him in the eye.

Taken back, Danny let go of her hand and turned away from her.

'So the truth comes out. You think I'm addict? I can stop when ever I want, I have been taking pain meds since I left the hospital, you never once called me a junkie before.' His voice broke from calm to angry.

'That's because you needed them Danny!' Lindsay said as she got out of bed throwing the covers back. Now standing at the side of her bed, in her boy shorts and tank top, she fumed with anger. 'You've never needed them to GET THROUGH THE DAY!' She yelled with her hands on her hips.

'Yeah this sounds like just talking to me.' Danny said sarcastically as he got out of bed, hissing in pain as his ribs turned the wrong way. 'I told you, I am in pain... yesterday it seemed worse, so I upped the dosage a bit. I'M-NOT-A-JUNKIE!' He yelled angrily.

'Self medicating whenever you feel like is not normal Danny. If you can stop when ever you want, then stop. In fact...' Lindsay said as she grabbed the pill bottle from the night stand and walked towards the bathroom.

'What are you doing?' Danny said with panic in his tone as he followed her.

'I'm stopping you.' She said as she opened the lid of the toilet, and opened the bottle attempting to flush the rest of the pills.

'Lindsay, Stop it! You're being ridiculous!' He yelled as he attempted to grab the bottle from her hands. 'Give me them!' He yelled as Lindsay pulled them out of his reach.

'No! Not until you admit you have a problem!' She said as she fought back, pulling them away from him.

'You are the one acting insane! Give me my pills!' Danny yelled as he grabbed Lindsay's wrist and forcefully pulled at the bottle.

'Ow! Danny, stop you're hurting me!' She yelled as Danny pushed her back taking the pills from her. Lindsay fell to the ground and hit her head against the back of the sink. 'Ah!' She yelled at her head made contact with the sink.

Danny stood back and stared at Lindsay sitting on the floor holding her head, his hands began to shake as he looked at the bottle in his hands and Lindsay on the ground.

'Oh god... Lindsay! Oh god I'm sorry... I'm sorry! I didn't mean to!' Danny said as he leaned down to help her as she flinched as he near.

'Get away from me Danny!' She said as she got up and pushed his out of the way and ran from the bathroom. Danny fell hard against the wall as he slumped to the floor. Still holding his bottle of pills as tears came to his eyes.

'I'm sorry... I'm sorry Lindsay.' He said quietly as he sat on the floor crying. Bringing his knees to his chest and his hands to his head he began to cry. His breathing was becoming labored as he hit himself over and over. 'I'm sorry!' He cried as his sobbing became worse and worse.

Hearing his sobs, Lindsay returned to the bathroom. Standing in the doorway she watched as Danny slowly tore himself apart as he cried. Not being able to watch anymore, she took a few steps towards him and sat down next to him and rubbed his back, feeling her presence, he turned towards her.

'I'm... sorry!' He cried as Lindsay pulled him into her arms. As he began to cry harder. 'I would never hurt you. I'm sorry!' He cried.

'Shh, it's going to be alright. Just breathe. It's ok.' She said as tears came to her own eyes, as she rocked his body back and forth.


	28. Chapter 28 RATED M BE WARNED

Lindsay sat with her back against the wall on the bed with Danny asleep on her lap for hours; once he calmed down he fell asleep with his head resting lightly on her thigh as she stroked his hair. Sitting awake watching him sleep, her heart broke. She had helped him when he came home from the hospital, during the nights when the pain was too much to bare she would sit holding him hoping to get him through it. She would force him out of bed on days when he had given up. She was there, but she never noticed. She hated herself for not seeing the problem before it got this bad, for not stopping him and helping him. She hated that she was still to blame for his pain and for his struggle.

Feeling him move she leaned forward and watched as he slowly opened his eyes. Looking up at her, the memories of their fight came back to him as he squeezed his eyes shut again and looked away.

'Danny...' Lindsay said softly as she ran her hand through his hair. 'I'm going to take care of things.' She said as she felt him tense.

'No, Lindsay I have to fix this myself.' Danny replied, as he gave her knee a light squeeze as he sat up in bed, with Lindsay still holding his head. Taking his face in her hands she pulled him close.

'Let me help you.' She said sternly as she stared into his eyes. Without saying a word, he leaned forward and pressed his forehead against hers, closing his eyes in the process.

'I love you.' Lindsay said as she reached up and kissed his forehead.

'I never meant to-' He started before she interrupted.

'I know.' She said without her lips leaving his face.

'I wasn't thinking, I would never hurt you. I didn't mean to, I swear.' He said as tears came back to his eyes.

'Danny, I know.' She said as she kissed his eye lids. 'I know it was an accident. Just relax.' She whispered as she trailed kisses down his cheek to his mouth. 'I love you.' She whispered softly as she pressed her lips onto his.

'I love you, too.' Danny repeated as he opened his mouth allowing her tongue access. Deepening the kiss, he brought his hands up to her hair and pulled her closer to him. Moaning slightly at his touch, Lindsay inched her knees up until she was sitting in his lap. Feeling his body stiffen as she pressed against it.

Trailing his hands down her back, he pulled at the bottom of her tank top and pulled it up, their lips only separating seconds as he discarded her shirt. With his index finger her ran a soft touch down the middle of her spine, causing goosebumps to attack her skin.

His lips left hers as he began to trace shapes with his tongue down her cheek to her neck, kissing and sucking the soft skin as he went. Lindsay pushed her head back allowing his more access to the skin above her collar bone as his hands made their way up her to soft breasts. Kneading them hard, he dragged his teeth over the skin of her collar bone as she bit her bottom lip. Digging her nails into the skin at the back of his neck, she pulled his shirt over his head and found his mouth again.

'I'm sorry.' Danny said into her mouth as Lindsay wrapped her arms around his neck.

'Shut up Danny.' Lindsay said as passion took her body, pressing her hips into his.

'No problem.' Danny smiled as he lifted her by the ass and pushed her body back onto the bed. Once on top of her he went back to work at her breast and sucked the skin down her chest until his mouth stopped over her belly button as he stopped looking down at the boy shorts below as Lindsay pulled at his hair.

With a free hand he pulled the waist ban down with on finger as he kissed the fresh skin below her button. Lindsay closed her eyes as he ran his tongue over the sensitive skin below her waist, gasping as his hot breath blew on the untouched skin.

'Danny-' She moaned as he made his way back up her body trailing hot kisses between her breasts as he went. Stopping only to remove his now tight pajama pants, '-I don't want to wait anymore.' She whispered seductively as he hovered above her before he entered, causing her back to arch as he slowly filled her. 'Oh god!' She breathed as tears came to her eyes as he slowly began to grind his body into hers. Holding onto his chest as his shoulders flexed working his way into her. Lindsay's breath caught in her throat she she watched his scars stretch over his muscles as their bodies glided together. Unable to control himself, he leaned down taking her mouth in his, needing to feel her tongue, he forced her mouth apart with his tongue as he dove deeper and deeper.

Lindsay gasped out as Danny pulled her body on top of his rolling over on the mattress. Sitting up so she was straddling his toned body, Lindsay ran her nails down his chest leaving red marks as they went. Moaning out at the sensation, Danny clenched his muscles as her pumped hard into Lindsay, his breath getting caught in his chest. 'Linds-' He moaned as Lindsay leaned forward and kissed him again, as her body reacted she bit down on his lip pulling it with her teeth as she gasped out.

Danny watched Lindsay as her eyes closed, breathing heavy, hating himself for nearly throwing this away. Pushing up on his elbows Lindsay held his shoulders as she moved in rhythm with his body.

'I love you Danny.' She said between breaths as she wrapped her arms tight around his neck as he sat up closing the distance between their chests as he nibbled on the skin of her collar bone once again. Danny held her shoulder blades as she tasted the skin below his ear.

'Ah, Linds- I can't...' Danny sucked in air as tears came to his eyes as he lost control, giving in to her body. Feeling him coming to an end, Lindsay tightened her grip onto him, helping him along.

His body shook as Lindsay found his mouth, feeling him tremble beneath her, she held onto him not letting him out of her grips. Lindsay sat watching tears slowly roll down his cheeks he stared into her eyes.

'You're shaking.' Lindsay said softly placing soft kisses on his eye lids, as his heart raced. Breathing heavily, his body continued to shake softly in her grasp.

'Just... just let me hold you. Just for a couple more minutes.' He said with his eyes closed as they rested their foreheads together, taking in each others presence.

'Ok.' Lindsay said in a whispered tone, as she squeezed his body to hers.


	29. Chapter 29

Danny walked sheepishly into Mac's office with a soft knock on the door frame, Mac looked up from his computer seeing Danny in the frame.

'What's up?' He said cautiously as Danny slowly entered.

'Ah, I... Can I talk to you for a sec?' He asked as his hands danced around his midsection, unaware of what to do with them.

'Yeah, have a seat.' Noticing immediately that something was wrong, as he leaned back in his chair.

'OK, yeah... sure.' He said awkwardly as he sat down in the seat across from his boss. 'The reason I'm here... well what I want to talk about is... well OK-' He babbled.

'Danny?' Mac stopped him, as Danny looked up at him. 'Take a breath.' He said with a friendly smile, noticing his awkwardness. Taking a deep breath he closed his eyes, and continued.

'I came back too early.' He said plainly as he opened his eyes and looked at his superior.

'I know.' Mac said as he rested his hands on the desk in front of him.

'You know?' Danny said with confusion.

'Course, I know.' Mac smiled.

'Then why did you let me come back?' He asked with a kink in his brow.

'You're a grown up Danny; I can't make decisions for you. Besides you were cleared for duty, on paper there was nothing I could do to stop you.' He said plainly. 'If you aren't ready I can give you two more weeks or you can stay and work in the lab, it's up to you.'

'Yeah, I guess... I mean-' He stopped and looked up at Mac. 'What if I'm never going to be ready?'

'You will be.' Mac gave him a reassuring nod.

'Yeah.' Danny looked down at lap, embarrassed and ashamed.

'Look, Danny, I can't even begin to understand what you are going through, but I do know this; You are a good cop.' He stood up from his desk and walked around to in front of where he sat. 'I don't hire idiots!' He said with a smile. Danny laughed through his shame.

'Thanks Mac.' He said looking up at his boss. In reply, Mac gave him a smile and a nod.

'When you decide what you want to do, let me know.' Mac said give him a light tap on the shoulder.

'I will.' He said as he got up from his chair, returning to his unfinished paper work in his office. 'I know I already said it, but... thanks.' He said before leaving his office.

* * *

Lindsay waited patiently in their office, wondering what Mac would say to Danny. Knowing what he had been through, she knew Mac wouldn't be hard on him. The whole team had felt the effects of Danny's attack from the first bullet; they all loved and helped him through it. From sitting at the hospital for the three weeks he was unconscious to just spending their free time with him while he lay awake in pain. Just being there for him didn't feel like enough, they felt as if they needed to do more. Guilt does that to a team, especially when they are more like a family. 

Hearing the door knob turn she turned in her chair to see Danny entering their shared office, he looked broken, once again.

'What did he say?' She asked instantly.

'I can choose.' He said as he dropped into his chair roughly.

'Choose what?' She said as she got up from her chair and walked around, sitting on his desk in front of him as he brought his hands to his face and rubbed the stress from his temples.

'I can go home, or just do lab work for the next two weeks.' He said finally dropping his hands and looking up at her.

'What do you want to do?' She asked calmly, watching his neck relax against the back of his chair.

'What?' Danny said with a chuckle.

'What's so funny?' She crossed her arms as she asked.

'No, I just thought you would have been putting my coat on and kicking me out the door.' Danny said with a smile.

'Well, I want to, but you said that you wanted to fix this yourself. I figured I owed you that much. Besides if your in the lab, I can watch you.' She smiled.

'Lindsay my Savior!' He smiled as he leaned forward, running his hands up the outsides of her thighs. Lindsay smiled at their immediate closeness as she reached down and placed her hands above his.

'Someones got to do it.' She said as she kissed his forehead, bringing her hands to his cheeks. Danny closed his eyes feeling her breath on his head as he brought his hands up to her waist and held her.

'Thank you.' He said in a low, almost whispered voice as he pulled back looking her in the eye. 'Seriously Linds, thank you.'

Lindsay smiled, and brushed his hair out of his face. 'Any time. Anything. Anywhere.' She said, as Danny saw a sparkle in her eye.

'Ahem.' They heard from the door way, letting go of each other pretending nothing happened, looking to the door they found Stella smirking as they shifted uncomfortably. 'Sorry, was I interrupting?' She smiled.

'Ha, no... what's up Stel?' Danny smiled sheepishly as he stood up, walking over towards her as Lindsay found her spot in Danny's chair.

'I found possible matches for the finger prints we found on the door way.' Stella explained noticing the gloss from Lindsay's lipstick on Danny's forehead as she leaned closer and wiped it with her thumb, in a loving way. Danny blushed as she did so, taking the papers from her hands and looking over them.

'Too many partials?' Danny asked looking up at Stella.

'Yeah, looks like there isn't enough to get a match. Either we'll have to do this manually or find more evidence.' She said looking back and forth between Danny and Lindsay.

'I can go back to the scene and see if I can find more prints?' Danny asked as Lindsay sat forward in her seat.

'-but Danny?' She asked, with fear in her tone.

'I know, it's OK. I have until the end of the day to decide, so I might as well work until I figure out my route.' He said turning back to her.

'I don't think that's a good idea, I'll go.' She said standing up.

'Am I missing something?' Stella asked confused.

'It's nothing, don't worry about it. I'll get my kit.' Danny said walking back towards his desk.

'Alright, let me know.' Stella finished as she left the room.

'I thought you said you'd take it easy?' Lindsay said in a concerned tone.

'It's just finger prints Linds... it's not like I'm chasing suspects.' He said plainly as he picked up his kit.

'Fine, then I am coming with you.' She said sternly as she picked up her own kit.

'Good, I'd love the company.' He smiled as she walked past. 'But I'm driving!' He said as they left the office.


	30. Chapter 30

Danny pulled his pocket knife from his jacket and cut the seal on the apartment door, keeping people out of the crime scene, and opened the door. Gesturing to Lindsay to enter before him, he leaned down and picked up his kit. The pain in his chest was a light vibration, to which he attempted to ignore but was failing miserably. Knowing the pain medication was getting out of hand and getting between him and Lindsay, he chose to stick out the pain and deal with it as it came.

'What do we know?' Lindsay said taking her flash light from her kit and looking around the room.

'We know who ever did this wasn't a fan of this guy.' Danny smiled, knowing Lindsay hated it when he goofed off when she was serious.

'Clearly.' She replied dryly. 'I keep getting the impression that they were looking for something that he wasn't giving up. He fought hard... what could he have had that he'd fight to the death for it?'

'A woman?' Danny replied.

'No really?' She asked in a serious tone.

'No, I'm serious. A man would do anything to protect the woman he loves, and vice-versa.' He winked, knowing Lindsay had saved his life when Lucas came back to finish the job. Lindsay smiled, he would do anything for her, and she would for him. Being through the last months, she had no doubt that they were meant to be together until the end. When he was in a coma, she knew if he didn't wake, she wouldn't have cared what happened to her. Nothing mattered to her but him, and for that she was grateful to share this moment, among others, with him.

'Who said chivalry is dead?' Lindsay smiled.

'I didn't.' He said as he looked around the crime scene.

'I think you're right... he was definitely hiding something.' Danny said as he got lost in his thoughts, seeing something sticking out from under the bed.

'What?' Lindsay asked as Danny crouched down on his knees, hissing at the stiffness in his ribs once again.

'There is something under here.' He said as he and Lindsay moved the blankets from the bed away and pushed the mattress across the floor, revealing a two by two foot cut out in the floor boards. 'The boards... they look like they've been cut, don't they?' said Danny, turning back to Lindsay who was now looking at Danny with the same confused look on her face.

'Yeah, nailed back down, and covered up.' She said running her gloved hands over the nailed floor boards.

'What do you think is down there?' He asked, looking up at her kneeling beside him.

'Sorry, my x-ray vision is broken.' She replied as Danny smiled at her sarcasm.

'Alright, alright. Whatever it is, I hope it was worth dying for.' Danny said with sadness in his tone.

'You alright?' Lindsay said putting her hand on his arm.

'Fine.' He lied, this case disturbed him. 'I'm going to get the saw from the truck.' Danny said getting off the floor.

'Alright, you sure you're OK?' Lindsay asked again looking up at him from the floor.

'I don't know...' He paused for a second. 'I think I'm going to take the two weeks off.' He said looking at his feet.

'What made you change your mind?' Lindsay stood up to face him.

'I think I just realized...' He took a breath, Lindsay took his hand in hers. 'I'm not a kid anymore, I don't get the same rush when I solve a crime, you know, when I catch the bad guy. I just need some time to figure stuff out.'

'OK.' She pulled him close for a hug, he accepted it. 'Remember, I'm here OK? I'm not going anywhere.' She said into his shoulder as she held him.

'I know. Thanks.' He said as he kissed her neck. Hovering above the skin for a second he pulled away from here. 'But, we should finish up here so I can get out of here.' He forced a smile as he turned to leave the room.

'Alright, I'm going to check for prints while your gone.' Lindsay said as she bent down and began pulling her kit open.

'Be right back.' Danny said pulling his gloves off of his fingers as he left the room.

Lindsay began dusting the floor boards, finding many partials and full prints. She had found a new hope in finding the person responsible, and for Danny to heal completely and properly. For the first time in months, she felt better, she felt hope.

The moment was short lived when she heard a ruffling sound coming from the entrance of the apartment. Standing up, she walked to the door of the bedroom, surprised Danny could go down and back so fast. She hadn't reached the opening of the door when she called out. 'That was quick.' Before the figure came into focus, she realized it wasn't Danny. With no time to react, she felt a fist come in contact with her jaw, and fell backwards, hitting her skull on the dresser as she went.


	31. Chapter 31

Lindsay fell to the ground hard, she felt a sharp pain in the back of her head as it connected to the dresser behind her. Yelping in pain, she felt someone taking her gun off of her belt.

'Who are you?' The man yelled.

'I'm with the crime lab.' Lindsay answered holding the back of her head with both hands, reeling from the pain.

'I don't want any trouble, aight? I just came for my shit!' He yelled as he walked to the cut floor boards, holding the gun on Lindsay.

'Alright, just don't shoot. OK?' Lindsay said calmly holding as still as possible.

'Put you hands behind your head, and get on your knees!' He yelled pushing the gun down in the middle of her back.

'Ok... alright... fine, just.. just take it easy.' She said without looking at him as she did what he instructed. Finally resting on her knees, he came behind her holding the gun to her skull.

'Are you alone?' He asked, the anger very present in his voice.

'I am right now.' He answered, trying desperately to stay calm.

'Aight. Hold still, I won't hurt you if I don't have to.' He said pulling Lindsay's hand cuffs off of her belt and cuffing her wrists roughly by the lower part of her back. 'Get up.' He ordered once again.

Standing up, dizziness took over her vision as she swayed back and forth. Leading her by the cuffs and gun, she walked to the place in the floor.

'Just stand there, don't move.' He said as he pulled a hammer from his deep coat pocket, leaned down and began pulling the boards off the floor. Lindsay watched him as he ripped them back showing what was in the floor. Money. What had to have been millions of dollars, laid untouched under the floor. Not noticing her jaw drop, she watched in shock as he worked.

Through all the work he didn't notice the front door open and close, Lindsay inched backwards, hoping Danny would see her before he came into the room.

'You see this, girl? If you play your cards right you might just get a taste.' He laughed as he began shoving the money in a large black bag.

'Drop the bag.' Danny said with a calm voice as he stood in the doorway with his gun raised at the man before him. Jumping into action, the man lunged behind Lindsay, using her for cover as he pressed the gun into her temple.

'Get back or I'll kill her.' He said loudly as she held Lindsay tight to his body.

'No you won't.' Danny said calmly. Watching Lindsay shake, his hands stayed perfectly still.

'Oh yeah? How do you know?' He yelled still hiding his face behind Lindsay's head.

'If you were going to kill her, you would have killed her when you had the chance. Drop the gun.' Danny took a step closer, gun still aimed.

'Fuck you! Get back man, I'm not kidding!' He yelled, taking a step back from Danny as he inched towards them. Fear took over Lindsay as he pushed the gun to her head, tears formed in her eyes.

'Neither am I. Drop the gun... I'm warning you.' Danny took another step closer.

'What are you gunna-' He yelled as Danny pulled the trigger.


	32. Chapter 32

Lindsay head whipped to the side as the bullet flashed by her face hitting the man between the eyes. Small drops of blood splashed her face as the man fell to the ground with a audible bang. As if in slow motion her head turned back watching the man hit the ground as tears came to her eyes.

She could hear the mumbled sound of Danny talking to her and the sharp pain of the hand cuffs left her wrists, completely numb to her surroundings she watched Danny as he pulled her face to look her in the eyes, unable to speak.

'Lindsay? Are you alright? Lindsay!' Danny said taking her by the shoulders and shaking her. 'Talk to me babe.' He repeated as she stared off in the distance. Danny looked from her to the man laying on the ground, watching the blood pool around the large hole in the back of his head. The large chunks of brain proved his fare well. Looking back at Lindsay he attempted to wipe the blood from her face as she brought her hand up stopping the motion.

'You didn't have to shoot him?' Lindsay asked finally finding her voice.

'He was going to kill you!' He defended himself.

'No... no, you said it yourself... he would have done it when he had the chance! You didn't have to kill him Danny!' She said as a steady stream of tears began to fall from her eyes.

'I was protecting you. I did what I had to.' He said with a straight face, almost too calmly.

Looking into his eyes, Lindsay knew he had changed. His vacant expression on his face showed how not shaken he was by taking someones life. The Danny she fell in love with would have torn himself apart for god knows how long; the Danny before her seemed proud of his actions, no matter how he justified it. Lindsay stepped back from him to where the man lay, looking down at his dead frame fear once again took over her body as uniformed officers began filling the room.

Danny spoke to the polices that arrived as a paramedic jogged to Lindsay and began checking the small cut on her lip from where the fist made contact. She seemed fine, other then her head ache.

'Who called for backup?' Lindsay asked as Mac and Stella entered the room.

'I did.' Danny said walking up to his three co-workers. 'I came back to the apartment, I heard him talking to you and I saw the cuffs. So I called it in.' He explained to Lindsay.

'What happened?' Mac asked as he brought his hand to Lindsay's face examining the fresh cut.

'We found something under the bed, which turned out to be a couple mil', Danny went down to the truck to get the saw and while he was gone this man came back to the scene. He hit me, took my gun and cuffed me. I...' Lindsay stopped looking up at Danny.

'What?' Mac asked looking between Danny and Lindsay.

'I came back to the room, told him to drop the gun after taking Lindsay hostage, the situation escalated and I fired.' Danny lied only slightly.

'Escalated how?' Stella asked noticing Lindsay's awkwardness.

'He was going to shoot her, so I shot first.' He said with a straight face as Lindsay shot a glance up to him.

'Alright, when we get back to the lab Flack is going to need formal statements. I.A.B. will be all over this. Danny I need your gun.' He said as he put gloves on and took the gun from him.

'OK.' Danny said as he turned sharing an uncomfortable look with Lindsay as he walked away.

'He alright?' Stella asked watching him leave the apartment by Lindsay's side.

'Yeah... he's fine.' She said with fear in her tone as Stella gave her arm a light squeeze.

'Let's get you to the hospital, see if he did any more damage.' She said pulling Lindsay's arm away.

'No the medic said I am fine, it's just a cut.' She said still not taking her eyes away from where Danny was once standing.

'You could have a concussion?' She said in a motherly tone.

'No I'm fine. Really Stella I am. I'm going to go talk to Danny.' She said as she passed her following Danny's trial out of the apartment.


	33. Chapter 33

Lindsay found Danny sitting on the steps in the alley way that he had found the day before when the crime scene made him sick. Coming up behind him she sat down behind him and rested her arm across his shoulders.

'I didn't say it before... I was in shock, but... thank you.' She said sweetly as she rested her chin on his shoulder. 

'I'm sorry I scared you. You know I would never let anything happen to you again.' He said looking into her eyes.

'I know.' She replied as she reached towards him and gave him a light kiss on the lips. 'Are you OK?' She asked again.

'Yeah. Just numb I guess.' He answered looking ahead. Turning back to Lindsay, he brought his hand to her face, where it was beginning to bruise. 'How's your head?' He asked.

'This head?' Lindsay said bringing her hand to her cheek. 'This head is hard!' She smiled. 

Danny smiled back, admiring her strengths. 'You know what kept me so calm?'

'What?' She asked.

'You.' His attention turned back to her brown eyes. 'The thought of loosing you again; it made me completely calm. My hands didn't shake.' His face was blank of expression.

'You shot a man in the head?' Lindsay said in shock and confusion.

'I did what I had to.' He said turning away from her once again.

'No... you didn't. We could have talked him down!' Lindsay said realizing that Danny didn't have to kill him, he did it out of spite.

'Yes I did, and I'd do it again. You know why?' Danny said as he stood up and turned to face her as his eyes glistened with tears. 'Because for once, I saved you; you didn't get hurt. Because if anything ever happens to you again and I don't do anything to stop it, I won't be able to live with myself.'

'I didn't get attacked because of you, Danny! It wasn't your fault!' 

'Yes it was! He came for me!' Danny yelled, hoping she would see it how he saw it.

'No!' Lindsay said as she stood up and took a couple steps closer pointing her finger at his chest. 'I was in the wrong place at the wrong time. Stop blaming yourself!' She yelled as she pressed her finger in his chest.

'I can't.' He said as his voice left him. 'I can't Linds. You lost our baby and it happened because I wasn't there to protect you.' He finished as his head dropped to his chest.

Lindsay finally understood why the stress and pain he had been blinding for him; he had been carrying around the responsibility of loosing their child.

'Danny?' Lindsay said softly taking a step towards him, she took his arms in her hands, but he pulled away. 

'I'm sorry.' He said quietly as he turned away from her.

'Stop apologizing. Please! Danny, look at me.' She said bluntly. 'Look at me!' She repeated, taking a breath he turned and looked her in the eye. 'You don't have to protect me all the time. We have to get past this, we can't keep carrying it around with us everyday.' Taking his face in her hands she pulled him down and softly kissed his lips. 'It's going to kill us, and I'm not ready to loose you.' 

'I know... I'm sorry... I mean.' He stopped, and smiled.

'We have to get past this. We have to put it behind us, Dan.' She said as sh pulled him into a hug, wrapping her arms around his chest and resting her cheek on his chest. 

'I know.' He said as he hesitated to hug her back, but slowly pulled his arms around her small body and rested his chin on top of her head.

Pulling back so she could look up at him, Lindsay realized she would never see the man she fell in love with again, that person died with Lucas Messer, instead she had to learn how to love the damaged man she held in her arms.

'We're gonna be alright, I promise.' Lindsay said hoping he really heard her.

'I hope you're right.' He answered as he dropped his arms to his side and held her hand loosely. 'We should get back to the lab... give our statements.' He added, as he turned away from her.

'Danny?' She said as he turned back to her.

'Yeah?' He asked with a kink in his brow.

'I love you.' She said plainly as tears came to her eyes, not knowing why she was crying all of a sudden.

'I love you too, baby what's wrong?' He said moving close to her cupping her face in her hands.

'I don't know, I'm sorry!' She said as she began to sob. Danny rubbed his thumbs along the side of her face. 'I don't want to loose you again! I can't! I don't know what I would do!' She sobbed harder and harder.

'I'm not going anywhere.' He said softly as her breathing increased. 'Linds? I'm right here!'

'No! You're not... you've been gone, I miss you! I just... I just... I want you back!' She sobbed as her knees became weak and she dropped. Danny grabbed onto her body as she went, falling slowly to the ground with her. As she collapsed in his lap, he wrapped his body around hers as she cried into his shirt, soaking the front of it.

'Montana I'm here... I'm right here .' He said as he rocked her back and forth. 'What do you mean I've been gone?' He asked as holding her head in his hands.

'I've been trying Danny! I'm trying to be strong for you, but you just push me away, and I can't do it anymore. I just want what we had!' Her eyes were red and puffy from tears as she looked up into his eyes. His heart broke.

'Linds...' His voice cracked as he held her body as he gazed into his girlfriends eyes. 'I'm sorry, a thousand times I'm sorry. I didn't mean to push you away... I just didn't know how to deal. I don't want to loose you either. I love you, I promise, I'm not going anywhere.' He held her head in place, making sure she could see in his eyes that he wasn't lying.

Lindsay was at loss for words, there was nothing else she could say, so she nodded her head and squeezed her eyes shut. 

Seizing the opportunity, Danny pulled her close and kissed her. Slow at first, then he pushed his tongue between her lips, forcing her to feel his presence. Lindsay moaned through tears and she brought her hands to his head and held him by his hair tight as Danny's tongue explored her mouth not letting her move. He kissed her in a way that made her feel as if she had been claimed, she was his, and he would never leave her. She reacted by kissing him back in the same feverish manor, forgetting about air, forgetting about the drugs, the shooting, the pain. She kissed him back as if it were their last kiss and they had to make it last. Danny let out a soft moan from deep in his throat as his hands moved down her back pulling her body flush against his, as her hands pulled at his hair that was trapped between the knuckles on his fists. His tongue ran over her teeth as he pulled back, gasping for breathe.

Sitting with Lindsay in his lap, still holding her just as tight, his lips never left hers as they say catching their breath. 

'I love you Lindsay.' He said with his eyes closed.

'I love you too.' She whispered back, as he hands began to flatten the hair on the back of his head.

'I think we should get married.' He said plainly as the air came back to his deflated lungs.

'What?' Lindsay said finally opening her eyes, but not moving from her position.

'Marry me.' He didn't ask, he stated. He wasn't taking no for an answer. 'We love each other, we already live together, we made it through all this bullshit together, I want to have babies with you, we can't live without each other... and really, I love waking up next to you everyday. I love you. Marry me?' He finished as he opened his eyes and pulled a piece of hair away from Lindsay's eyes. 

Hearing his words, she felt as if he had sewn the pieces of her heart back together, she felt whole again. Instead of answering she did the next best thing, he wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him, joyfully. He was so surprised by her reaction he fell backwards and landed on his back with Lindsay on top of him kissing him feverishly over and over.

He laughed through her reaction and managed to speak.

'So...' _kiss_, '...I...' _kiss_, '...take...' _kiss_, '...that...' _kiss_, '...as a...' _kiss_, '...yes?' He finished, and he began to kiss her back as she nodded in reply. 

Danny smiled and kissed her back, wrapping his arms around her once more. He was happy, for the first time in months. They were both, finally, happy.


End file.
